Never say never
by pennyhope
Summary: Angsty teenage drama that fell apart. Now Luke and Reid are forced together again. Drama ensues. My first fanfic. I dont write but I I have enjoyed so many here I should contribute. Obviously the characters are not mine. Obviously they are tweaked also.
1. Chapter 1

For the first time in a long while, Luke found himself on edge, distracted – as if something was making him uneasy. So he rose from his desk and left his office and headed towards a property he bought years ago on the outskirts of Oakdale. The property held two places he felt very strongly about – Snyder Lodge, which is a Retirement village/Nursing home and also a Childcare centre – Mayer Manor.

He never had a strong drive to care for the elderly or had a particular interest in children, but what he does have is a strong connection to family. He always felt that he was so blessed to have his family and was lucky enough to have been left a huge fortune from his birth father that he wanted to not waste the opportunities he had and to contribute to the community. The catalyst for this was the death of his partner Noah. This happened 5 years ago. The Luke of old would have resorted to inappropriate ways to escape his pain – he had done it before. Knowing Noah would be disappointed in him made him not stronger but determined to redevelop a life plan.

Luke parked between the retirement village and the childcare centre, named in Noah's memory and made his way out the back to a huge chessboard out in the sun. He waved at his friend Katie on the way through, smiling to himself as she chased one of the kids from the childcare centre as he ran squirting coloured paint all over her. One of the tenants of the village was sitting beside the chessboard, his face lighting up as he saw Luke walk over to him. Tom was 72 and got a lot of joy beating Luke at chess and telling stories of his youth.

After an hour long game, with Luke again playing abysmally, his best friend Casey piped in.

"Bloody hell Tom, cant you let the sorry bugger win for once?"

Luke replied with "Hey, Case, you off soon? I am starving?"

"Yeah, just came out to bring you in for dinner Tom. You about ready? Or do you want to finish him off again?"

Tom chuckled, but took his cane that Casey held out for him. "See you next time Luke. And remember – the Queen's Gambit!"

"Sure Tom, but you know you will have to teach me that again!"

Luke sat on the bench in the sun and let his mind wander to Noah. He missed Noah. More because he was so incredibly lonely, and that Noah was taken from him – not that Noah was the love of his life. He thought to himself that he was not so sure if that really existed. His life so far has not turned out the way he planned, but back when Noah died, what did he know – 26 and so incredibly naïve. He was still a child when his future fell apart. Now he was 31 and Luke felt his life was already planned out for him, happy but not fulfilled and with no way to control it.

Luke could feel Casey staring at him. He looked up and saw what he often saw from his two best friends – Katie and Casey. He saw a mixture of pity, caring and confusion.

"Luke, I know I say this all the time, and I know Katie does her fair share of nagging too. But Luke, you need to live. You're a 90 year old in a 30 year old body. Its like you given up on life."

Luke sighed deeply. "Not this again Case. I am happy. I enjoy my work a lot, I am close to my family and I have great friends. I don't need anything else."

"Noah wouldn't want –"

"Well neither you or I know what Noah would want, cause he is dead."

"Luke. C'mon mate.."

"Look Case, I am not saying that if Noah was still alive I would be with him or even happy. I am not pining for him. I am not anything. I am just living my life. Can we just not do this again? Lets get going already. I want to talk to you about the money I am donating to the Memorial. I really need some advise."

* * *

Katie ran to the phone, panting by the time she answered it. "Hello?"

"Katie its Reid. Reid Oliver."

"Reid? Reid you idiot, I know your voice without you needing to give me your surname! How are you? Why haven't you been calling me back? Did you get the photos of Jacob I emailed you?"

Reid laughed; she always gets so excited on the phone "Slow down Katie! Sorry, I have been busy –"

"You are always busy and last time we skyped you looked horrendously tired. Probably not eating properly either."

"Ah, have you forgotten who you are talking to? Eating is one of the many things I do very well."

"So what's news?"

"Well, I have had a few calls from Bob and your husband – has Chris not told you?"

"He said he wanted to talk to you about something. He was asking if I thought you would ever come back here. I thought he was joking, or maybe talking about a referral he had. What's going on?"

Shit, Reid thought to himself. He should not be telling Katie any of this – her bloody family should be. "Well, sweetie, Bob is getting older now – "

"What the hell is wrong Reid, does he need you to treat him?"

"Calm down and let me finish. As I was saying, Bob is getting older and he is close to, if not well over retirement age. Chris would have been the logical choice to take over as Chief of Staff at Memorial but it seems Chris wants to stay heading the Paediatric wing. So Bob has offered me the position."

"What? That's fantastic. You're coming home?"

"Oakhell isn't home for me. Hasn't been for a long time"

"Don't be stupid Reid. OakDALE will always be your home"

Reid laughed in spite of himself. Katie was always brutally honest with him. It's why they have remained such good friends.

"But Reid. Will you not get bored back at Memorial? I mean, I thought you were taking a position at the Mayo?"

"Well, that is the other attraction – Bob said they have confirmed funding from a donor and have been sorting what to do with the money. Bob wants to set up a Neurology Wing – only on the proviso that I develop the plans and run both it and the hospital."

Katie didn't realize she was holding her breath the whole time Reid was speaking then. He obviously had no idea where the money was coming from. He is not going to be happy. Unless, maybe he does know and that is why he is returning – no that's ridiculous. Luke and Reid always acted like they hated each other, but she knew their true feelings were just as strong but more like desire or love. Those two were pretty intense during their short and steamy relationship before Reid ran away from it all. But it was messy when it ended. Really messy. And Luke was broken for so long. She is going to have a serious talk with her husband tonight. He really needs to run all thoughts passed her before he acts on them.

"Hello, earth to Katie"

"Reid, shit sorry. Its just, Reid, do you know where the money for the new wing is coming from?"

"Well it better be set in stone cause I have quite my job here, packed my unit and I arrive in Oakdale tomorrow."

"What – why didn't you call me earlier? And Reid, its not that its not set in stone, I know it is."

"How do you know that? Since Chris hadn't even mentioned I was coming?"

"Umm, the donor is the Grimaldi Foundation. And the CEO is on the hospital Board to help design the new wing – so that means you and Luke will be working directly together as of tomorrow."

Shit. Fuck. Fuck.


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks everyone for your feedback. It has really helped. Again, I dont own these characters. Just writing a drama to get through some insomnia!

* * *

Shit. Fuck. Fuck.

Luke.

Reid felt breathless just thinking about him.

Luciano Eduardo Grimaldi

No one cold get under his skin the way Luke could. Nor has anyone since Luke. Luke was always a spoiled little rich boy that always got his way. Its seems little has changed if he is living off his fathers legacy. Luke was incredibly attractive also. He has sunny gold hair and deep brown eyes. When he wanted something, if his name didn't get him results, those wide puppy dog eyes and pouting lips worked consistently. Especially on Reid.

Reid first met Luke on the debate team. Luke was a few years younger. The team in general was pretty stupid. Reid was the intelligent one, leagues above the entire squad, and Luke was the new kid that was smart enough but his strength was his ability to argue and drive a point home. Luke was put into the 1st team with the seniors, with Reid. He had seen him around before, but when he walked in with his smile, Luke had Reid distracted immediately. And it irked him.

"Hi, I'm Luke." He grinned at the rest of the team. They all replied, except Reid. So Luke just stared at him expectantly.

"What are you staring at Grimaldi"

"My name is Luke. Luke Snyder. And I don't see why my name is important science nerd" the blonde brat huffed.

"I really don't care what your name is, I just don't want a junior blowing this cause he solely has a place on the team cause rich daddy bought us a bus."

"Feel free to walk to the next debate then ass-hat. You talk so much you should probably conserve your energy though." He then raised his eyebrows and turned his back on me. The rest of the team just stared, waiting for my normal bitch slap with words. For the first time in a while I found myself speechless. After that I ignored the fact that he was so incredibly hot, and just continued to dislike him. Spending my time contradicting, baiting or proving him wrong.

Which seemed to irk him as much as my initial attraction to him irked me.

Every day the team met for an hour – either as a whole or groups doing research. Reid did his best to avoid Luke in these sessions.

Once a month we had a sort of debate team social. It was really a fancy gathering of rich families. And Reid. And it was always at the Snyder's farm. And it was compulsory. Luke always spent his time with this insipid brunette called Noah. They seemed best friends but Luke seemed to follow him everywhere and it made Reid wonder if Luke might be gay. Or maybe hoped. God, Luke was always so passionate – he couldn't imagine what it would be like to kiss him.

Well, Reid got confirmation of Luke's sexuality six (6) months before he graduated. He was at one of the ridiculous debate socials at Snyder Farm. Reid was avoiding most people and had wandered off down the property and was near a pond, circled by over-hanging willow trees. He heard raised voices and when he heard Luke, he somehow found himself following the sound until he was standing behind a wide willow trunk.

"Luke, I am not gay. I am with Maddie."

"Well you are half right Noah, you are with Maddie, but if you are not gay, then why do you keep on kissing me? And when we kiss I know you want me. Christ I feel that you want me! You want this"

Reid watched Luke gently grab Noah with both his hands, but kissing the brunette with such need. Luke ran his hands down the brunette's chest then looped his finger into his belt and brought their hips closer. Reid heard the brunette gasp.

Suddenly the brunette pushed away from Luke.

"Enough Luke. I am not like you – "

"What, honest?"

"I am not like you. I am not gay. I don't want to be gay and I don't want you. You are my best friend Luke. But you will never be more."

Reid stood there behind the tree and realized he had never been more turned on. He tried to back away as he saw that when Luke looked up he had tears in his eyes, but he tripped on the roots of the tree and Luke saw him.

"How long have been lurking there eavesdropping?"

"Long enough to know that if I kissed a guy the way you just kissed him, and then he walked away, I would be gutted. Yet still turned on – as you appear to be."

"Bastard" The word escaped Luke's mouth as he stalked over to Reid. As Reid prepared himself for a punch in the face, he was most surprised when the blonde ditched pretty boy pushed him up against the tree and crushed their lips together. Reid could feel the pent up emotion in the younger guy but felt himself gasp at his audacity. Luke gently bit down on his lips then gently swiped his tongue over where his teeth had been.

I wrapped a hand around Luke's neck to hold him in place and let the other creep down his chest to rest on his hips to push their bodies close together. It wasn't a gentle kiss. It was hot and rough and had both boys moaning their pleasure into the others mouth. Luke pushed his leg between both of mine and rubbed my now straining erection. I need to touch him. I pushed my hands up his t-shirt and flicked my thumbs over his nipples. He moaned into my mouth and I took the opportunity to push in my tongue.

Suddenly he pushed away from me.

"Jesus Christ, what am I doing?" he said.

"Well, I can tell you, you know exactly what you are doing."

He just stared at me as I spoke, with those big brown eyes no longer dark with lust, but pale and insecure. He turned then and walked away.

The next six (6) months involved a twisted sort of relationship where Luke and I didn't really date, but more so met for debate team – but in reality spent long hours touching, kissing and always ending in hot sex. I used to occasionally catch him staring at Noah with this longing look on his face. I knew he had strong feelings for him but I felt like it didn't matter. Cause at the end of the day, Luke was in my bed.

I was going to college soon and I was slightly nervous what that meant for us. I had been accepted to Washington State University but I hadn't told him. School was over and I wanted to put off telling him I was leaving the state for now.

The day I told him I loved him was the best and worst of my life. I was sitting on the edge of my bed watching Luke leaning on my desk, talking animatedly about the ban on live animal export trade. It was an old debate topic but Luke had been fascinated with it ever since. A debate topic we were meant to be working on. He was so passionate, like we as teenagers could make a difference. I simply interrupted his tirade and said

"I love you"

"What did you just say?"

"You heard me Luke."

I could feel my neck flush, the heat creeping up towards my cheeks. Whilst he just sat there blinking at me with those gorgeous brown eyes. Minutes passed and I started to panic. What the fuck had I just done? Blown this whole thing obviously.

Next thing Luke flew at me and I was thrown back onto my bed. His warm lips pressing mine open while his tongue tasted me. I could feel him smile against me. "I love you too nerd."

I flipped him onto his back and straddled his waist. "Don't call me that Richie rich." I pulled my shirt over my head as Luke reached up to graze his hands down my chest to open my jeans. I dragged his polo over his head and suckled my way along his jaw to nibble at his ear, which always ended in a moan and a very turned on Luke. We were naked in minutes and I looked down to see Luke licking the tip of my penis. "Luke." I held his head in place until I nearly came. I pushed his head up and said "I need to be inside you Luke."

He smiled and tossed a condom at me that he pulled out of his jeans off the floor. "Then be inside me."

I fingered his hole as he moaned my name. As I slid into him he gasped and started panting. "Jesus Christ Reid, just fuck me." I pushed into him harder, each time he pushed back. I reached around him and started to rub his penis in time with my thrusts until he screamed out my name and came all over the bed, with me following inside of him.

That was the best part.

The worst part was a few hours later.

I felt so alive and happy after hearing Luke say he loved me that I needed to see him again before I slept. I went over to his house. His mother told me he was down at the pond. She had a strange look on her face. I found out why when I reached the pond.

I felt my stomach drop, the bile rising in my throat. Luke was kissing Noah. I turned and ran but not before they broke apart and saw me.

"Reid wait"

I kept running. My rage at being humiliated by that bastard sending me away from him.

"Reid please, its not what you think"

Luke caught up to me and grabbed me on the shoulder. I spun around and punched him in the face. He cried out in pain and I saw blood drip from his fingers over his nose. I immediately regretted what I had done but still turned and left him rolling in the dirt.

His nose would heal. At that point I couldn't see my heart healing.

That was the last time I saw Luciano Eduardo Grimaldi.


	3. Chapter 3

Thanks everyone for your feedback. It has really helped. Again, I dont own these characters. Just writing a drama to get through some insomnia!

* * *

Luke and Casey had just polished off their steaks, Luke was just starting to relax again.

"So Case, I wanted to talk to you about the new wing at Memorial. The money from the foundation will be directed at funding a new wing. I will be involved in the design but Bob is still deciding on whether to refurbish Paediatrics or Oncology or set up a Neurology wing. I have been avoiding Bob's calls for a while as I have been distracted and not really focused. What do you think?"

"You have been like this for years Luke. You work hard but its seems part of you is always somewhere else."

"No Case, I meant my ideas about the new wing."

"Oh well, it should really be Neurology shouldn't it? I mean both the Oncology and Paediatric departments were refurbished not too long ago – at least they exist. Neurology patients – like some of our stroke patients just get spread between other wards. Which is not ideal and makes both the facilities and staff training inadequate."

"That sounds feasible. Speaking of strokes, isn't Tom doing well? He is such a strong man. So determined to not let anything beat him."

Just then Katie wandered in and sat with them.

"Hi Katie" they both said.

She didn't reply and just sat there for a minute staring at Luke.

"Katie, what is it? What's wrong? Is it Jacob?" Luke asked.

"Luke, I am so sorry. I wish Chris had told me, or at least spoken to me about this before he and Bob made a decision. I didn't know they were going to ask him to head the department, and now he is also Chief of Staff when Bob retires in a few weeks. And he only rang me himself just now. I have been trying to find you. Why didn't you answer your phone?"

"Katie, Katie, KATIE! Slow down. What is wrong? What are you talking about?" Luke tenderly rubbed her arm. Se felt even worse. He was the most gentle and loving person she knew – he was not going to cope well with this.

"Luke it's Bob and the new wing you are funding – and helping to set up. Bob and Chris have already decided it is to be a Neurology wing."

"That's ok, that's good actually – I think I just decided that myself."

"No Luke, that's not all. Bob has retired and has already found his replacement. No its not Chris before you say anything."

"And…" Luke prodded.

"Well the specialist that will be the director of the Neurology wing will also be Chief of Staff at Memorial."

"They must be extremely qualified and skilled then Katie. What is the problem?"

"Luke, its Reid. Reid is the director of the new Neurology wing and he is also the Chief of Staff. He arrives tomorrow."

Casey and Katie watched as Luke's face blanched, and then went bright red as he seemed to be holding his breath.

"I have to go-"

"Luke wait, stay and-"

"I am sorry guys, I cant, I have to go" they both watched as Luke nearly ran from Yo's.

Luke slammed the door to his apartment and slumped onto the lounge. This cant be happening to me he thought. I can't see him again. I cant. I still think about him every day. Thinking about his beautiful blue eyes, soft lips and his gorgeous red-blond hair.

He replayed their last day together in his head over and over. Reid never gave him the chance to explain, broke his nose and then disappeared. It has been so many years since he saw him. The day they finally said they loved each other. The day Noah also decided he wanted to come out of the closet. Luke let his mind wander.

"Please Luke, can we talk. Walk with me down to the pond."

"Sure, but I cant be out long, I have something I want to do"

"What?" asked Noah "Are you seeing someone?"

Luke's eyes and unconscious smile said it all to Noah.

"Who is he Luke? Do I know him? I thought we had something?"

"What? Noah, you pushed me away, Jesus, you were still hiding your sexuality. You cant have expected me to wait indefinitely"

"I am sorry Luke. I know what I want now."

"And so do I Noah. I don't want you. I want-"

Noah rushed forward "Don't you dare say his name. I know you want me."

Luke simply shrugged at him. "Not anymore Noah. Not like that."

"I know you want this." Noah grabbed Luke's face with his hands and roughly kissed him, forcing his tongue into his mouth. Luke felt nothing kissing him. Not the fire he did whenever Reid just looked at him. He started to shove him away.

He looked up when he heard a gasp behind him. Reid looked devastated. But Luke knew that Reid knew he loved him. Noah kissed him and he didn't respond, he was pushing him away. So he chased after Reid to explain, say something to take that hurt look away from his eyes.

Next thing Luke was laying in the dirt, his head spinning.

He woke in the hospital the next day, sporting a broken nose and a major bruise over his eye. His first thoughts were of Reid. He had to find him, to explain. Make him understand. Then make HIM apologise for over-reacting and bashing his boyfriend.

He left the hospital at a rush. Taking a taxi to Reid's home. He lived with his parents.

"Sorry, Luke is it? Reid isn't here."

"Oh. When will he be home?"

"Uh, he left for Washington this morning."

"WHAT? Why? For how long?"

"Well, for at least 5 years. He is studying medicine at Washington State University."

"But he only got the letter the other week. Term wouldn't be starting for a few months. He is on holiday now." I explained. Panic clear in my voice as the pitch rose inappropriately high.

"Well, it was sudden. He came home last night. Said he was leaving in the morning to find somewhere to live, get to know the town and set up so he can concentrate on getting ready for his future."

"Shit. Reid. What are you doing. Oh, I am sorry."

"He did look very upset last night. I am starting to realize you may be the reason. I just want him to be happy so we let him go."

"Can you tell me where he is staying?"

"Luke. I am sorry I cant. He was very clear when he said no one from Oakdale could know where he is. We don't even have a mobile for him. He said he lost it and will call us tonight when he arrives and then will sort the rest later."

As she spoke I felt the tears spill down my face. I couldn't breathe. This cant be happening. I can't lose him. I cant breathe.

Again, I woke up in hospital.

"Luke, sweetie, you're awake" I opened my eyes to see my mother watching me.

Oh thank god, I thought. I dreamt he left. I reached for my mobile to call Reid and start to sort this mess out. I stopped with my arm mid-air as my mother said "Luke sweetie, why were you around at the Oliver's? When she rang me to say you collapsed and I got the fright of my life. You should not have discharged yourself from hospital. Well you didn't even discharge, you just…..blah blah blah" I zoned out from listening to my mothers drivel.

It wasn't a dream, or a nightmare. This was real. Reid is gone.

I want to die.

* * *

Luke woke from his sleep and that awful dream he has had so many times. Threw his keys at the wall "Fuck" and walked to the kitchen to find something he could eat.

This is brilliant. Reid is coming back to Oakdale and I am a mess.

No worse than that. I am a mess, and an idiot because he obviously cares so little about what we had that he is coming home without a problem. I know I sure as hell can't imagine being anywhere near him and actually coping.


	4. Chapter 4

Luke woke early, realising he was still on his lounge, wearing his clothes from yesterday. After a long hot shower he felt a little more human. He hurridly dressed and headed into the office. As he entered his office he wondered where Alice his secretary was. He made himself a coffee and got stuck into some work. After a few hours of a mixture of work and cursing his mac he stalked off to find Alice, or someone to help him fix the bloody thing that kept on shutting down.

He found the foreman of the dock. "George, where is everyone? I cant find Alice?"

"Luke, ah, its Saturday. You stopped Alice working Saturdays years ago"

"Right, yes, I did. Well good. She needs a life." So do I, I thought to myself. And obviously George was thinking the same thing as well, Luke noticed George was watching him with raised eyebrows.

"What is it you need Luke? Can I help?"

"Actually, come with me George" Luke spoke as George started to follow him upstairs.

"The problem is my computer just keeos shutting dowm. I keep losing the documents I am working on. I know enough about macs to get by but this is beyond me."

"Oh Luke, I am PC all the way, and I can really only send an email. The assistant you hired for me does all the computer work so I don't have to."

"Damn. I knew I would regret employing him!" Luke chuckled at the older man. "Not to worry. I think I might head off to Memorial. I want to have a chat with Bob."

Luke realized that he needed to sort this new wing out, and as he wasnt really getting anything done at the office, now was as good a time as any. Bob should have told him about Reid. Not that he knows anything about the history there. Luke found himself speeding to get this issue resolved quickly. Hopefully before Reid arrived and realized there was an issue. As he obviously didn't have one himself.

Luke knocked on the door of the Chief of Staff. Bob was such an inspiration to Oakdale. He would be truly missed when he retired.

"Come in" Bob answered from the other side iof the Door.

"Hi Bob, I haven't got you at a busy time have I? I just wanted a quick chat about a few things."

"Luke, good to see you. I have been trying to get you the passed few weeks."

"Sorry about that. I have just been pretty busy." Luke averted his eyes hoping Bob wouldn't notice he was uncomfortable at potentially being caught in a lie.

"So what can I do for you Luke?"

"Well I wanted to discuss the new wing. I am happy the money I am giving to Memorial is being used for the neurology wing, I think it will really improve the standard of care that can be offered to the patients at Memorial. However, I do have an issue with not being consulted about the Dr that will be heading the wing and as such working with me. I should have been involved Bob."

"I did try to keep you apprised. You haven't returned my calls or emails for some time now. However at the end of the day Luke you will not be involved in the decision as to which Dr I employ. Neither as my replacement as Chief of Staff or to Direct the new Neurology wing."

Luke felt his temper rise as Bob gave his speech.

"Bob, do you even know anything about Re-, this Dr Oliver? He will have a significant role here at the hospital and in the community. I am just not comfortable with this."

"Luke, what is going on? its not like you to judge people before you have met them. Dr Oliver truly has a reputation that precedes him. His skills and experience at his age are outstanding. To top it all, he is from Oakdale anyway. I think you may have been at school with him. Do you remember him?"

This is pointless and very frustrating. Luke sighed to himself. " Look Bob, I have to go. I will talk later. But I am not happy." Luke turned and walked out, ignoring the surprised look on Bob's face.

Luke closed the door behind him and leant on it with his hands on his hips, releasing the breath he didn't realize he was holding, saying to himself "This is so not ideal".

"What's not ideal Mr Snyder? That you have to take directions from me for the next few months or that your money cant sway all the people of Oakhell?"

Luke looked up to see Reid leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, smirking to himself.


	5. Chapter 5

Luke felt his nails dig into the palms of his hands. He stared at Reid trying to take him in. Standing in front of him after all these years, wearing black jeans and a black turtleneck jumper. That turtleneck would be perfect after I had - stop thinking about that! God he is so fucking hot. I cant believe he is here. Those jeans he is wearing are so tight. I wish I hadn't worn this shirt, I think it has a hole in it. I swear those jeans. Stop looking at his crotch idiot. Shit he is smirking, he caught me staring at his crotch. Oh god, stop blushing. Take a breath you fool. Calm down.

Yep, this is definitely not ideal.

Luke took a deep breath and closed his eyes, in a pathetic attempt at composing himself.

"Reid, hi. Hello. Um, so how are you?"

"I thought public speaking was your forte Mr Snyder? And its Dr Oliver to you."

Ouch, cold.

"Don't be a wanker _Reid. _What the hell are you doing here anyway?"

"Working, or soon to be. What the hell are you doing here _Mr Snyder_?"

"I meant why have you come back to Oakdale?"

"My decisions are of no concern to you. I, different to the rest of this town, dont feel the need to answer to Snyders"

"Dont be ridiculous. No one here answers to my family. I am -"

"I know exactly what you are. You are the person that happens to runs a company that had already donated money to my new wing. That is it. That is the extent of your involvement"

"If I knew you were going to be the result of my donation then I can sure as hell tell you I would not have made it."

"You will always be the spoiled little rich kid. Using your money to get your way. That's why you haven't left this small town all your life. Out in the real world you would have to rely on hard work. Something you know nothing about."

"Well feel free to turn around and leave this small town."

"Ha, I doubt that very much. I am here for now. I will be deciding what, where and when regarding the Neurology wing and as I am Chief of Staff – anything else relating to this hospital. Starting now with you Mr Snyder – you can leave."

"I was leaving anyway you arrogant bastard. Call me when you need my money to start the new wing."

It was not until the lift doors closed that Luke could take a breath. His palms were sweating, his mouth was dry and he couldn't quite decide if he wanted to bitch slap Reid, or drag him into the closest room and remember his smell, the way his hair felt or to trace his…

Get a grip you child. "I am a grown man. I can handle this. I run a shipping company, a charity foundation, a retirement village and a childcare centre. I can handle running into my ex boyfriend."

Who are you kidding Luke, you havent been in control of your life for years. Being near Reid is not helping.

* * *

Right, Reid thought to himself.

First meeting, sorted.

Verbal bitch slap, sorted.

Making sure he knows I am in charge, sorted.

Now, lets go and sort Dr Bob Hughes. The man who seems to think he is running a tuck shop - letting any odd bod come in a give their two cents worth. Well, not when I am in charge.

Reid knocked on the door that read Chief of Staff.

"Bob, Dr Reid Oliver. How are you?" as he shook the older mans hand. Looks like a grandpa that should have retired a long time ago.

"Ah, Dr Oliver. Lovely to meet you. How does it feel to be back in Oakdale? Have you sorted your accomadation?"

"Well, Oakdale is a bit of a hole, but my Neurology wing was always the appeal. I am staying with Katie. I thought I would come and meet you first, sort a few details, then take my luggage to her house."

"A hole? Oh, well some say quaint but I really think we are just an intimate community. But the new wing will really take Memorial into the 21st century. Did you say you were staying with Katie?"

"I am actually quite tired, I just wanted to drop in and introduce myself and as I said, finalise a few details."

"Sure. Where should we start, ah…."

"Well how about why the hell have you given Luke Snyder so much say in the set up of my Neurology wing? What the hell can a spoilt little rich kid contribute?"

"Dr Oliver, forgetting the fact that as a major donor, Luke Snyder has a history of successful business management locally and has a very intimnate understanding of the community's needs. He will be a real asest to this project."

"I doubt that very much. So as of now, he no longer needs to be involved – now that I am here."

"Oh I don't think you understand, his financial contirbutions have been significant. Even if I agreed with you, which I dont, part of the arrangement of the dontation is his involvement in the project."

"Bob, I am not happy about this."

Neither is Luke, Bob thought to himself. They just need to get to know each other. Everyone loves Luke and Luke doesnt have the capacity to dislike. "I have booked a table at the Lakeview for dinner – you, Luke and myself – for tonight."

Reid scowled at the older man. "I cant, Katie has arranged something" Reid lied. Hoping he could at least make himself be unavailable with Katie.

"Oh, I just spoke to her and she said she was happy to change plans."

Bloody small towns. "Wonderful."

"Well, I might call Luke and let him know. Anything else you wanted to discuss now? otherwise, I just have a few things to do..."

"No bother. Nice to meet you Bob. I will speak to you later to organise this pow wow tonight."

Reid turned and left the room, mumbling to himself the entire way to Katie's house.

He was distracted when he knocked on the door, not prepared for Katie to launch into his arms.


	6. Chapter 6

Here is the next chapter. Bit slow in coming due to my life being a shambles. Now, I am sure there will be some negative reviews for this chapter. I am not sure if I am happy with it. I do have a plan though. Please fell free to give me feedback, negative or not. Just know that I am a Luke fan first up. Both Noah and Reid are enjoyable in their own different ways - and I do live them both.

* * *

"Reid! I cant believe you are here! I am so excited."

"Its good to see you too Katie!"

"Here, take your bags into this room. It will be yours now. Then come and have a coffee with me."

"I hope I am not too close to Jacobs room. If he has tantrums anything like his mother then I pity my ears."

Reid chuckled to himself as Katie gently smacked him on the back of his head. Reid looked around the house and wandered over to the lounge room wall. Katie had lined the entire wall with different frames filled with photos, lots of Chris and Jacob but also Brad and her friends. Two photos got his attention. Both were from high school and both were photos of Luke and himself. The first photo was from a debate meet. He was at the podium speaking, shaking his finger at something and in the corner of the photo was Luke sitting at the team desk watching him. Only you could see that Luke wasn't concentrating on what he was saying, but looking at me with –

"You know he really did love you. Christ Reid, look at the way he used to look at you. Have you seen him yet? Have you spoken to him?"

"Katie it was never an issue of him not loving me. I think he did. But I was the filler for the real thing." Pointedly ignoring the question she asked hoping it would pass. He then looked at the other photo. Luke and Reid were at a park, they had gone there with a few of their friends. Well, in reality – it was one of the few times Reid had allowed Luke to drag him somewhere with his friends. The group was having a picnic, and he didn't realise Katie had taken this photo. Reid was laying on top of Luke. Reid was trying to get a macaroon back that Luke had taken from him. They had ended up rolling around on the blanket, but all thoughts of the macaroon disappeared as Reid lay there looking down into Luke's beautiful brown eyes that reflected his own. They said –

"And that photo was when I realised that you loved him. You guys were so happy that day."

"Jesus Katie, get out of my head. Why the hell do you still have these photos and why are they up on your wall. Its kind of creepy really. And you know they really need a clean. The glass is filthy."

"Be quiet cranky and don't bark at me. They are photos of my friends and I love them." And she thought to herself, I am not telling him that every once in a while when Luke comes to visit she catches him gently touching the photos. And he only goes to these two, not the ones of Noah.

Katie watched the back of Reid's head as he made his way to kitchen and started making coffee. "So, have you?"

"Have I what?"

"Reid!"

He sighed and turned to glare at her. "Yes and yes." He turned from her then and finished making the coffee. She smiled to herself realising that he remembered how to make hers. It wasn't until they were seated on the lounge that she prodded him more.

"Well?"

"Katie, what the hell do you want me to say? Yes I saw Luke, Yes I spoke to him. Was it awkward? A little."

"How did you feel when you saw him?"

"Katie he was a lifetime ago. I have no interest in him anymore. Now he is just a man with a full wallet." Reid sat there clenching his jaw.

Katie thought for a while. Kissed him on the cheek and started to leave the lounge room in search of her phone. Reid was grateful that conversation was over. She then turned back and said "You know Reid, most people clench their jaw when they are mad. But you don't do anything normally. I know you. You have only ever clenched your jaw when you try to lie to me. You clench because you don't like lying to me. So I will let you have this one. But this is open for another day."

He was starting to miss his old life. Lonely yes but no one to pry.

Just then he got a text. It was a voicemail from Bob. _Reid hello its Bob Hughes here. There is a restaurant next to the Lakeview. It is a new Italian restaurant called Dolcissimo. Luke is meeting us there at 7pm. See you tonight._

Brilliant.

* * *

Luke sat and watched the sunset this evening. He had always liked sunset. It always calmed him, no matter what had him bothered in the first place. Now he so rarely took the time, or let himself be distracted. Today he watched the sunset at one of the paddocks down stream from Snyder farm. For years it was vacated but now he owned it. Not many people knew that he owned it and he like to keep it that way. For more than one reason. Firstly so he could have a space if he needed it to get away from everyone. This town is so small everyone is in your business. It is one of the things he loves about Oakdale but it also means everyone is always in your business! There is no privacy to be happy, to grieve, to make a fool of yourself. It can be smothering. The other reason he bought the land was probably not so wise. It was just after Noah died and it was a place he sometimes brought Noah to , to ride their horses and it was where Noah had his accident that ultimately killed him. When he was here Luke felt connected to him. It gave him strength when he needed it but it was also his weakness.

He sat on a tree branch and thought about Noah, about their lives together. Noah was the first person he loved, but back then he was a boy. He thought he knew it all and that he couldn't survive without Noah. But back then he was trying to survive without him as his boyfriend, now he survived without him as a man. As his lover? No. Noah was not his lover after their few times in early high school. Before his next love, and the only love he has had. Which sounds both tragic and romantic but its just sad really.

Noah was his best friend. They were inseparable – Luke was gay and confident where Noah was never really sure what he was and definitely not confident. But that only made Luke and Noah more close. They fell apart for a short time during the whole Reid debacle but they realised they each wanted and needed each others friendship. Their different problems gave each other strength to go on. Whilst Noah struggled with his sexuality and identity, Luke struggled with his broken heart. Back then he felt so broken but at the same time so stupid that he was so weak for not being able to move on. He knew Reid had as Katie occasionally let a few things drop. He and Noah lived together, they were partners in a film studio. It was small and barely making money, but it made them both happy.

Noah died five years ago when he fell from Luke's horse. They switched horses that day solely as Luke felt like riding Noah's horse. Luke was trying to make Noah believe that it's the rider not the horse that makes the team skilled, not the other way around – meaning Luke's horse was not the key, but Luke himself. A snake was laying on the path, which would normally have been a problem for Luke's horse – as Noah was on Luke's horse, it was him that was thrown when he reared, and him tht cracked his skull.

Luke was devastated when Dr Hughes told him he was brain dead and that his closest relative needed to be contacted to make decisions. Luke was his next of kin. That was Noah's way of distancing himself from his father that never supported him. So Luke was the one that had to make the decision to turn off the ventilator. He made the decision to end Noah's life.

No one really clearly understand the relationship that Luke and Noah shared. Some thought they were soul mates, others thought temporary boyfriends. Luke never discussed it once Noah died. Noah was his best friend. Their friendship is not a topic he will discuss with anyone. so they continue to think he is still grieving for him. He is, but he misses his friend, he misses his confidante, he grieves for causing his death.


	7. Chapter 7

Luke sat on the branch until it was dark. He started to make his way back to the car when he realized what time it was. 730pm. He was already 30min late for his meal with Bob and Reid. Bloody hell, this will not go down well. Luke thought to himself as he dialed Bob's number. "Bob, its Luke, sorry but I am on the way, I got held up. I am really sorry."

"Ah, not too worry Luke. I don't mind. We might order the entrée though."

"Sure thing, I will be there soon."

As he was being lead to the table where Reid and Bob were waiting, Maddie called out to him.

"Luke, what's going on, you look like crap."

He laughed at her half-heartedly. "Nothings wrong Maddie. I was just….off doing….I just got distracted."

"Luke-"

"Not now Maddie, I am really late for an appointment"

"Ok Luke, but were you there again? At Noah's place?"

"What, where? No I was….." He paused at she stared at him intently. "Ok fine I was." He felt his face flush and he turned away to avoid her sympathetic face. He didn't want people to feel sorry for him. Especially for all the wrong reasons. But as he turned away from her face, he looked right into Reid's eyes. Typical, he was standing right at his table. And although he had a blank look in his eyes, Luke knew he had heard that entire conversation.

"Maddie, I have to go. Call me tomorrow." He turned then and sat at the table with Bob and Reid.

"I am really sorry I was late, I got held.. held up."

"Mr Snyder, it is incredibly rude to think that we don't have other commitments also. Which are now affected due to you leaving us here waiting."

"I said I was sorry. I am not normally late, I just-"

"I don't care what you are normally. I have no interest."

"Ah, Reid, Luke, lets just calm down and try to enjoy the evening." Bob interjected.

Reid glared, Luke smiled. Bob thought to himself what a nightmare – how can two men who are polar opposites ever get along. As the three sat there silently he realized he was going to need to keep the conversation going. What was wrong with Luke, he was always keen to get to know people.

"So, Reid, how are you settling back in? How is my Katie doing?"

"Well I have been here a whole 5 hours, and every minute has been enthralling. And since you had morning tea with Katie, you have probably spent more time with her today than I have."

"Right, yes, that's good. And Luke, how is work going? Busy?"

"humph" came from Reid's direction.

"What Reid" Luke snapped. "Do you have some comment about how I don't have to work for a living, silver spoon in my mouth and all that crap you have said before?"

"Well, since you have half a shrub in your hair, I don't think you have been working too hard" he drawled at Luke.

Luke gasped and started rummaging through his hair unsuccessfully until Reid reached over and plucked the offending leaves from his hair. Luke gasped again as he felt every hair on his neck stick up as Reid lightly brushed his head. He counted to ten willing the blush he knew was coming to stay away, hoping to take charge of his body. Surprise, surprise he failed. He refused to look up at Reid, he knew he was watching him, he could feel his eyes on his face.

Christ all fucking mighty this was going to be a long night. Why don't they just pass around nude photos of him, Luke thought to himself, he couldn't be any more humiliated right now.

"I was just near the farm, in a paddock. Something for work. Anyway, lets order. I think I will have the veal with mushrooms and then I will have dessert."

Dinner was tedious but short as everyone else obviously felt the same way and seemed to rush their meal. Bob made small talk, Luke contributed with varying levels of interest and animation and Reid contributed one word answers.

Luke decided to skip dessert and made a dash for the door once the bill was sorted. As he turned the corner leaving the restaurant behind he took one look back and stopped for a second as his eyes met the ones he was hoping to but hoping not to meet. Reid stared back intently but as always, blankly. God, that was painful. In more ways than one. He knew he wouldn't sleep tonight so he headed to the office, at least he can get some work done.

* * *

Meanwhile, Reid was slamming through the door of the apartment he was now sharing with Katie. He walked straight passed Katie and her mess spread over the table. She stared at the back of his head and wandered how many times this would happen over the next few weeks, months or whatever when he was forced to work with Luke.

"How was dinner? They have great cannoli there. Oooh, and tiramisu. Yum."

"Fine, over cooked pasta but whatever. Tea?"

"Yes please"

"Stop staring Katie. What is all this mess about?"

"Oh, I am sorting some new day plans for the kids."

"Don't you just paint with them, feed them then sleep them?" Reid said with something that might have been trying to be a smile.

They sat on the lounge together, both staring at their mugs. Katie knew he wanted to talk, but she knew he would put a wall up quickly if she said something he didn't like or want to talk about.

"Reid, sweetie, what did you expect when you came back here. Were you really that naïve to think this wouldn't be hard?"

"Katie, stop misjudging what I am feeling. I knew seeing Luke would be hard because back then I was so mad at him. But leaving was the best decision I made. It has made me what I am now. My skills and knowledge are world class, and I would not want it any other way."

"Reid, I know that if I ran into any of my exes I would not be too happy. They are exes for a reason."

"I am glad I have seen Luke, seeing the person he has become has made me happy I am away from here. He was always a spoiled boy, now he is a spoiled man. He shows up 45 minutes late tonight, with no explanation – well at least a horse shit explanation."

"Reid that's not like Luke. He is not spoiled, are you kidding? Do you forget where I work? I know you know what he does with his money. You thoughts are obscured because of your history."

"Please, he donates money yes but he is entitled and expects to be treated differently because of it and he carries it off moreso because of his looks."

"Ha, so you still think he is sexy?"

"Katie, I am not blind. But it's irrelevant, I am who I am and I have never had a problem getting a hot guy."

Yeah, but she thought to herself, Luke would be the only one that takes his shit for more than one night.

"Reid, you should take the time to get to know him again. Everyone loves him. Maybe you are wrong."

"Yeah, yeah, the golden boy of Oakdale. Everyone but the prodigal Noah. I assume since he isn't around he ditched him finally ran a mile. The guy that Luke is still panting for, even tonight-"

"Reid! Stop that right there. I realise you don't know, cause I am the only person from Oakdale you speak to and I know I haven't told you but you better take this information seriously and not be a bastard with it."

"What are you talking about, poor little Luke had his heart broken by the big bad Noah. I saw some of the photos you sent me, with those two looking like they were going to start picking matching suits and sending out wedding invites."

"Well, if you let me ever talk about Luke or Noah then I could have told you that Noah died, years ago."

"WHAT? He's dead?"

"Yes, it was an accident. A horse riding accident. He and Luke were together. Noah fell apparently and knocked his head. Bob said he was brain dead." Katie stopped a minute to look at Reid's pale face, no smirk this time. "It gets worse Reid, Luke was his next of kin and had to make the decision to turn the ventilator off. But Reid, you cant mention any details of this. Luke had not spoken of this to anyone. I know what I know cause I badgered Bob to tell me. Luke hasn't even spoken to his parents about the details."

"That explains tonight then."

"What do you mean?"

"He was late and as he got to the table that friend of his Mary-"

"Maddie"

"Whatever, she asked him if he was at Noah's place and he looked uncomfortable."

"Noah's place? What do you mean? Noah was cremated and he doesn't have a memorial site. That's one of the things everyone was worried about when he died. Luke didn't…he uh….oh Reid, I don't know if I should tell you this. I don't know if Luke would want you to know."

"Well, everyone else seems to know Katie."

"Reid, be gentle with this information."

"Katie, c'mon."

"After Noah died, Luke had a service, more for everyone else than himself. Noah was cremated but not scattered and not put with a memorial stone. His parents and friends tried to get him to do something but he wouldn't. Everyone just assumes he still has his ashes. But that is wrong. It stops him moving on. Reid, I lost Brad, I know what it is like to lose your partner but its like he is punishing himself for Noah dying."

"Jesus Christ, what a mess. How long ago was this Katie cause he is still grieving, still in love with him."

"It was six years ago."

Reid and Katie just sat there staring into their mugs.

"Right I am going to bed" Reid suddenly stood up and walked to his room. "Thanks Katie, for this."

Katie watched him walk away. Did she just make a mistake telling him that? Maybe they need each other to be happy. God, they still had a connection from school but maybe it would be more. Well, at least I will do my best Emma Woodhouse impersonation and try, Katie thought to herself.


	8. Chapter 8

Thanks again for your feedback. Everyone has some great stories out there - so I get easily distracted with reading rather than writing!

* * *

Luke was sitting at his desk at the foundation the following Monday day trying to sort through some work. He couldn't concentrate, but he wasn't going to deny that the primary reason was Reid Oliver returning to Oakdale. He couldn't deny that when he saw Reid he felt something. He felt panic wondering what Reid still thought of him – did he still think he cheated on him. But more likely did he even think of him at all - not likely. He felt sad that Reid wasn't around years ago when he needed someone, when he needed him. He felt angry that Reid treated him like a stranger, worse than that, like an acquaintance that he didn't even like. But more than anything else he felt his heart quicken when he saw him, felt his neck flush when he stared at him. He wondered if he still had such gentle hands that always seemed like a contradiction to his voice. He wondered what he would feel if they kissed again.

"Focus idiot" Luke snapped at himself. All of this is not productive. In reality, he just needed to speak to Reid. However, he snorted to himself, that's not quite something Luke was looking forward to.

"Mr Snyder" His intercom buzzed.

"Yes Alice?"

"I have two people here to see you and I have told them you do NOT want to be disturbed but they insist on me asking you."

"Who are they Alice?"

"A Ms Katie Snyder and a Mr Casey Hughes"

Luke chuckled to himself. Alice had met his friends hundreds of times but she was a stickler to the rules and he did say he didn't want to be disturbed. He also knew she was fussing about him today. He heard her mumbling something about bags under his eyes and no sleep again when she wandered out after giving him his coffee. She really was amazing, the only assistant he had ever had and a life saver.

Luke was laughing as the other two entered, Katie looking humble and Casey looking outraged.

"Luke, she is a bulldog! She really doesn't like me does she?"

"Casey, that's not it, she was just doing what I asked."

"Luke, I actually really like her. She is so protective of you. Like having a mum at work."

"Katie, I don't need a mum at work for gods sake."

"No, don't get me wrong, I like it. I know you – you get into work mode and think of nothing else – I know she feeds you and all that. Its good."

"Oh well, good. What are you both doing here? Why aren't you at work?"

"Luke, its seven o'clock at night! I rest my case about Alice!"

"Hang on Katie" Luke picked up his phone and buzzed Alice. "Alice I didn't realise the time. Please go home, I'm sorry. No, no, I am fine. I will see you tomorrow."

Casey walked over and started fiddling with Luke's chess set, then stretched out on the lounge. Katie sat opposite Luke, folded her hands in her lap and stared at Luke. Luke wondered what she was thinking. He didn't have to wait long to find out.

"What are you doing on the weekend? Wait, I will re-phrase that, you are coming camping this weekend. It's not really camping, it's a great cabin a parent of one of my childcare kids owns. Its huge. Five rooms. With us. And some other friends."

Casey piped in then. "Well, me and Jenny. Maddie and her boyfriend – she said his name was Giles or something. Katie, not Chris cause he is working and also Jacob will come. I think Ali is working."

Luke waited expectantly, knowing what was coming.

"and Reid."

Camping with Reid. Camping with his friends – Reid just happened to be going too. If Casey and Katie both came today it would be a fight to not go. Maybe he would have fun.

"Sure."

Casey looked over sharply "What?"

"Sounds good guys."

Katie jumped up then. "Right. Well, I have to get home to Jacob, Reid will probably be crying tears of blood while he minds my poor son!"

"Yeah, I have to meet Jenny. See you later Luke." Casey rose too and they both left his office.

Which left Luke sitting at his desk. He continued to stare aimlessly at the papers in front of him. Deciding it was pointless he packed up and headed to Al's for some take out.

* * *

"I don't care Katie, he vomited on my journal article so I think that you owe me. Big time."

"Fine. I owe you Reid. I will make it up to you."

"I know you will. Like right now. With food. From Al's."

"Fine! But you know you are just as much a child as Jacob is."

"Less talk, more walk. C'mon lets go."

As they took their seats in a booth, Reid continued to bait Katie whilst she complained about being dragged out to dinner with Reid but she was having her revenge – not that Reid knew it – as she had organised for Chris to meet them later. Reid was not a great fan of Chris – or Doogie as he continue to call him. But too bad - Reid was her friend and Chris was her husband - they needed to get along.

Reid was reading the menu and tickling Jacob at the same time when he overhead the conversation from a few booths away.

**_"Luke, why not? He is really hot. He is smart –"_**

**_"Maddie no! I don't want to be set up with him! I know him already anyway so if I want to go out with him I will ask him."_**

Reid wondered who they were talking about. Him? Luke sounded very outraged.

**_"He is really sweet too." _**Maddie continued.

Reid then knew they weren't talking about him. Good. Being set up with Luke is not what he needs. Definitely not.

**_"I don't want a sweet guy."_**

Katie kicked him under the table, it was obvious that both of them were eavesdropping. "He doesn't want a sweet guy Reid."

"Shut up."

**_"I don't want to be set up on a date at all."_**

**_"You know what, I am just going to bring him along when we all go out. Maybe he can come camping?"_**

"You didn't tell me Luke was coming camping Katie. I am not going."

"What, are you scared to come away with a group of friends including Luke? I thought you felt nothing for him?"

"I feel something – it's a bit of nausea and a lot of irritation."

"Whatever you say and you are coming."

**_"Maddie, no. No dates."_**

**_"Luke, you have been 'no dates' for years. And you know what – don't think I want you all loved up, I just want you to get laid and crack a smile."_**

**_"Christ Maddie, my sex life is my business and no one else."_**

**_"Well I know you are alone in your sex life sweetie."_**

Reid smirked to himself. So its been a while for him huh?

"What are you smirking at Reid? How long since you got laid?" Katie whispered furiously.

"About a month actually miss smarty pants. Cute intern that talked too much. Taught him what better things he could do with his mouth!"

"Hello – child here – ear muffs warning next time!"

"Sorry."

Reid then thought about sex with Luke. He will never forget how it felt to get a blow job from Luke. He used to do this thing where he put his tongue –

"Hello – that vision went visual. But I am wondering who you were actually thinking of?"

**_"Don't get mad Luke, you always do when people try to sort out your love life. Its only because we care. You used to be happy. You rarely smile and its always now only when other people are happy, not you"_**

**_"Seriously Maddie, I am having too many of these deep conversations. My life has sucked. A lot. But if I am living with it why cant you and everyone else. And you all need to stop acting like my pimp and setting me up. The guys you set me up with are all wrong. And this nurse you are talking about, Maddie, he talks too much, he is always singing and, and. And I really don't like his shoes."_**

**_"That's pathetic Luke."_**

Reid smirked again. Luke always had a thing about shoes.

**_"More so, when I want to get laid I will sort it out myself and not go through a pimp!"_** Just then he stood up. And looked straight into a pair of blue eyes.

"What do you want?" he snapped.

"Nothing Luke, not like you so it seems."

"Fuck off Reid." He sighed then and stormed out of the café.

"That's Dr Oliver to you" he shouted to Luke's back as he left the cafe.

Ha, Reid thought, he was probably off to "sort himself out" as we speak.

"What did I say to you?"

"I don't remember – you say a lot and I often don't listen. But all that was very interesting."

"Its only interesting if you still feel something for him. Which you don't, isn't that right Reid?"

"That's right Katie. Can we not order yet anyway?"


	9. Chapter 9

Luke sat in the boardroom at Memorial waiting for the others to arrive. The reason he was waiting was that he got the time completely wrong and arrived an hour early. He was happy that his distraction at least had him remembering the meeting, as opposed to the last one where he forgot to show up at all. Bob was on his way, as were the other board members. The last few weeks he had been a bit of a mess – losing track of time, forgetting things, almost like his life was going on without him. He ignored the worried glances he continuously got from his family and friends. They always assumed he was still mourning Noah. Luke did miss him like crazy but, firstly, Noah would not want him to be miserable, and secondly and more importantly, it was actually nothing to do with Noah. There was no point not acknowledging that it was 100% due to Reid Oliver.

His heart stopped when he left him all those years ago and even with him around back in Oakdale, but in no way part of his life, Luke had never felt more alive. Pathetic really. Being happier because a man that hates you is back in town. It is so hard to be near him when Reid just treats him like an acquaintance he feels nothing for. Sadly he knows Reid does feel nothing for him.

Luke thought that after all these years he wouldn't really feel anything for Reid, but the minute he saw him it all came back.

I love him and he thinks nothing of me. That is so much worse than thinking Reid hated him. At least he would feel something for Luke.

Luke stood by the window mindlessly clicking his pen, oblivious to the other board members that entered and said hello. It wasn't until he smelt something familiar – a mix of mint and sandalwood and something else, something so unique to Reid, that he realised he wasn't alone. He spun around and noticed everyone seated. He frowned to himself wondering when they all arrived and mumbled something about the view to the park. Pointedly ignoring the source of that smell that woke him from his stupor.

The meeting droned on and on. Reid was barely listening to a word they were saying. Thinking about the patients he was seeing in the afternoon. He hated meetings like these – management trying to save money, Bob being Bob and trying to please everyone, and Luke – being well very unLuke. Where was his fight gone? He had got decidedly boring in the last few years and Reid knew he had to sort this shit out. If only to make this meeting more interesting and worth two hours of his life. Besides, Katie's stories about Luke's melodrama of a life made Reid feel sorry for him for a minute. Well that is horseshit – he has this town fooled, but not Reid – he cheated on me and made me look a fool – no one does that to Reid Oliver.

"Look gentlemen, all this is all very interesting, no wait, no it's not, its all very boring. Can we please get passed the colour of the walls in the waiting room and talk about something relevant, like why the hell the prep room for surgery is so far away from the op theatre – did you design this Mr Snyder?"

Luke looked up immediately and glared at Reid. "No I did not Reid. I am merely paying for it. You complain so much about my ideas I pointedly stayed away from the op theatre and anything to do with it. I have seen many of your tantrums and would like to get through ONE meeting without one."

"When I say no, I am not having a tantrum. You just don't hear the word very often."

"Dr Oliver –"

"Its alright Bob. Reid, your opinion is valued but you rarely show up to these meeting and when you do you either don't listen or just argue with everyone. Quite frankly it's a pain in the-" Luke flushed as Reid raised his eyebrows. "Its tedious" he finished.

Reid and Luke continued to argue back and forth for the next 20mintues until Bob broke them up. "Oh, look at the time. We will have to finish this next time. Actually Reid, Luke, I would prefer if you two sort out what you both disagree on between yourselves. We seem to be getting nowhere."

"NO BOB" they both snapped at the older man.

"Yes actually – this is a good idea. The board will postpone meetings for the next two months. You are the primary donor Luke and you are controlling the designs Reid – so you two come to the board at the next meeting in eight weeks with some agreed upon ideas."

With that Bob turned and walked out, followed by the rest of the board.

"God Reid, what is wrong with you? Look what you have done now!"

"Well I fail to see how any of this is my fault. If your ideas were not so stupid then I wouldn't need to disagree."

"Well if you were not so argumentative and were a little more open to other peoples suggestions then we wouldn't be in this situation."

"Fool"

"Asshole"

Reid narrowed his eyes and stepped closer to Luke. At the same time Luke watched Reid's eyes change and took a step back. "Well you would know Luke. You spent a long time years ago getting acquainted with my asshole, and I yours. Reid spoke in a voice so quiet it sent a shiver through Luke, or maybe it was the words.

Luke gasped and felt a flush creep up his neck. When he didn't speak Reid stepped closer still until he and Luke were mere inches apart. Reid watched Luke's chocolate brown eyes widen and Luke could see Reid's eyes deepen, knowing what that meant. Reid quickly reached out with his hand and hooked his finer through Luke's belt loop and dragged him closer.

Luke leaned closer, nudging his face towards Reid. Reid wrapped his other hand behind Luke's neck and pushed them closer as Luke licked his lower lip. God, Reid thought, those lips.

"Dr Oliver, I just…..oh God….sorry" a very short intern turned beetroot red then turned and raced out of the board room knowing that she was going to get her ass kicked for the rest of the month.

Too late for Luke and Reid though. Luke put his hands on Reid's chest and pushed him away, looking at his feet. Reid wondered what he was thinking – kissing Luke at the hospital. Christ, kissing him at all. Thank god he avoided that before it got started. He turned sharply and stalked out of the room and down the hall to his office and slammed the door.

* * *

Luke could feel his hands shaking on the steering wheel as he drove to his office. Making a decision, he made a sharp turn towards Mayor House. He walked round the back, hoping to run into Tom, he was always a good distraction. Strangely he had been the only person whom he confided any details of Noah's death with. Luke liked Tom a lot, always had. Tom never treated him differently – called him on his crap, didn't pander to a Snyder or Luke's dramas. Tom was cranky and always snapped at others – but he was different with Luke.

Luke jumped out of his car and walked round towards the chess set, not noticing that he walked straight passed Katie whilst he was rubbing his hands wearily over his eyes. He found Tom leaning over the black queen rummaging around in a hole in the base. Luke laughed to himself, knowing exactly what he was looking for.

"Tom, I can't believe you still smoke pot!"

"Luke, don't be crazy, I would never. Too old for that."

"Ha, I found your stash years ago. You and I are the only two who use this chess set and its certainly not mine."

"Luke, its probably Casey's stash anyway."

"Well I know he gets them for you but you are the one actually smoking the joint!"

"More importantly Luke, don't creep up on me like that. I am 84 years old. Any day I could have a heart attack."

"Pfft, you will live longer than me Tom. And your heart is racing cause I am onto you, you pot smoking hippy!"

Tom laughed outright at this and reached out to take the cup of tea Luke made for him. Luke wandered around and set up the chess set silently. Getting ready for a game. After they had been playing for about half an hour, Tom spoke up.

"What's going on Luke?"

"Nothing, I am thinking will I ever beat you in a match?"

"Well no you wont, and no you weren't!"

Luke straightened and just stared at Tom questioningly.

"No you wont ever beat me and no you weren't thinking that anyway. I know you Luke. Something is bothering you. I have always listened to you before, why not now?"

Luke fiddled with one of his pawns for a while, and then sat on the top of it. "Reid is back in Oakdale."

"As in your Reid?"

"He wasn't ever my Reid."

"Well, you wanted him to be and you have continued to want him to be for years. Even through Noah, god, even more because of Noah."

"I loved Reid back then. But after it all fell apart I thought that maybe it was just high school love – you know, silly immature love that doesn't compare to what you feel when you are grown up. But ever since he has come back I feel the same as I did then. When he is near me I can't function."

"Well you need to tell him. Tell him he was wrong back then and that you chose him."

"There was never a choice to make. It was always Reid. But it's too long ago. He doesn't think of me like that. He treats me like we had nothing back then. Like an acquaintance. Then today…"

"What?"

"There was just this moment, when we were close, and he touched me and it felt like it did back all those years ago. But he has treated me like nothing since he got back or argues with me. I don't know – it's just so fucked up."

"Have a smoke Luke, you need it." Luke looked to Tom's outstretched hand holding a joint. He smiled and shook his head. "No Tom, pot isn't going to help me."

"Christ no, but at least you will chill the fuck out. You are so intense sometimes. You just need to talk to him. You are both adults. You need to have the conversation you didn't have years ago."

"Potty mouth."

"Too true. Still talk to him."

"Nope, no chance. I got a black eye last time. I did nothing wrong. Noah kissed me. Reid over reacted and walked away. He claimed he loved me the bastard, but he didn't trust me."

Tom started clapping. Luke looked at him confused. "Well in all the years we have been talking, often about Reid bloody Oliver, that is the first time you have blamed him for walking away instead of yourself. Its about time."

"You know you are right. It was never my fault. He should have trusted me and he fucked up. Not me."

"Way to go Luke, take charge of your life!"

"Jesus Tom, you are a little high. Next you will have the munchies."

"The munchies? Why – you have some food?"

Luke just stared at him for a while then they both burst out laughing.


	10. Chapter 10

Reid walked into Katie's apartment and slumped onto the couch. He then noticed Katie making coffee.

"Oh, thank god, I need a coffee – can you make me one?"

"Make your own Reid Oliver. I am quite pissed off with you."

Then she turned her back on him. He frowned about to ask what the hell he had done when she spun around and glared at him. He then got a little worried. She looked not quite, but very pissed.

"Katie, I haven't done anything, I have been at work all day."

"What did you say to Luke?"

"What? I didn't say anything, well nothing out of the ordinary. What did the sensitive little unit say?"

"Fine, what did you do then?"

Reid's eyes widened as he thought about the boardroom – surely Luke wouldn't have mentioned the non-kiss to Katie.

"Ha, I see the wheels turning! What are you thinking? You did do something."

He was very thankful she didn't actually know anything. "Don't be crazy Katie, I haven't done anything to precious baby Snyder."

"Bullshit Reid, and don't call him that. I saw him walk past the childcare centre today and he looked awful. I know you had a meeting today. He spent the afternoon with Tom playing chess. I told you to be gentle."

"Wait, why did he go past the centre? Who is Tom and what do you mean about chess?" Reid threw all these questions at her, but at the same time remembering the hours he had played chess with Luke. Reid always beat him. Slaughtered really. Who is he playing chess with now? I wonder if he is any better?

The door bell ringing brought Reid back to reality. He walked to the door, still frowning and thinking about chess.

"Doogie, why are you ringing the doorbell? You live here, or did you forget?"

"Shut up Reid, this is called romance."

"Whatever girls blouse." Not at all interested in what what going on with Doogie.

Reid turned and walked back to the kitchen realising Katie was not going to make him coffee, and he also wanted his questions answered.

"Katie, you didn't answer me before about" he cleared his throat, irked she was making him ask again, especially in front of Chris "Luke"

Out of the corner of his eye he watched Chris look at him sharply.

Katie strode out of the kitchen and took off her robe, to reveal quite a skimpy dress underneath. She looked quite stunning. As she got to the door she turned and spoke to Reid "I can't talk now Reid, I have a date with my husband. Jacob will be dropped back here is a few hours – I should be back by then. You will be at work anyway wont you?"

"No, I just got home. I am allowed some time off you know. Besides, I have to give the other Doctors a chance to stuff things up so I can fix it."

Katie grimaced and looked at Chris quickly, he had the same look in his eye.

Reid assumed it was cause of what he said. If only Reid knew why.

After he ate some food and abandoned the coffee for beer, he spent the next few hours either watching the baseball or flipping through cases files. In reality he spent the time thinking about one Luke Snyder. Which really bothered him. What bothered him the most was what Katie half told him. Mainly the part about Tom. Who is Tom, his boyfriend?

Jesus, quit acting like a teenager with a crush, next he would be driving past his house to see if he was home.

I need a new mantra he thought to himself. So he said it out loud "I do not give a shit about Luke Snyder."

He nearly jumped off the lounge when he heard the key in the door. Katie and Doogie must be home. He was glad he didn't have to wait up for the kid. He turned to say hi and took a quick sharp breath in at what he saw. Standing in the doorway holding a sleeping Jacob in his arms was Luke Snyder. Luke Snyder in his house holding a sleeping Jacob. Wearing very tight jeans.

Luke looked over to the lounge and had just the same startled look on his face that Reid did.

"Oh, I didn't know you would be here. Sorry I just came on in. I have a key and Katie said to. You weren't meant to be here."

Reid just stared at him, watching as his neck then cheeks turned the same red as his polo. "I live here Luke." He smirked watching Luke's blush intensify.

"Right, well I will just put him to bed."

Reid followed him into Jacobs's room, watching as he laid the sleeping boy into his bed and tucked him into his bed. He then rummaged through a stack of toys until he found what he was looking for. "Here you go buddy, here's Doofy." He softly spoke to the sleeping boy then gently kissed him on the top of his head. Reid just watched this entire scene leaning on the door frame. He didn't realise he was smiling until Luke turned and spoke to him.

"What are you smiling at Reid? Doofy is his favourite. He sleeps with him every night. Well everywhere really."

"I'm not surprised it's his favourite, I gave it to him."

Luke looked up with wide eyes, surprise written all over his face. "Well, I have to go."

"Luke, wait."

Luke kept walking ignoring Reid. Reid caught up to him near the front door and grabbed his wrist. "Luke! Stay and watch the game with me. Have a coffee."

Reid watched Luke look down at his wrist that he was holding. He then firmly pulled out of Reid's grasp. "No I have to go."

"Or maybe we can talk about earlier today after the board meeting. Come on Luke, for old times sake. Lets catch up."

Reid saw a flash of anger in Luke's eyes. He often got fired up but rarely angry. He was angry now.

"Lets catch up? Don't speak to me as if we were just friends or acquaintances Reid. That's bullshit." With that he turned sharply and left the apartment.

Luke nearly ran down the stairs. He could see his hands shaking as he pushed the door open out of the foyer. he was torn between intense anger that Reid treated him like a stranger and that intense niggling excitement he always gets near Reid. He nearly ran straight into Katie and Chris on their way in. He then remembered he was pissed that they said Reid was not going to be there when he was. Totally set up. He wished Katie would stop trying to force them together.

"Luke, how was he. I hope he behaved himself."

His face softened immediately. "Oh Katie, he was an angel. He always is. I swear, nothing makes me laugh the way Jacob does. He says the funniest things. Never has a tantrum."

Katie stepped close and reached up to touch his cheek. "You will make an amazing father one day Luke."

"Please, I am a mess. I need to sort my life out first before I ruin another persons life."

Katie stepped forward and hugged him tight. She whispered in his ear. "I am sorry about tonight. He was meant to be at work."

He gently pushed her away. "Don't worry. Its just today was a less than average day, but at least Jacob brightened it a little."

"But then Reid obviously said something tonight."

"Chris, nothing happened-"

"Luke stop. I want to say something. Katie has told me about you and Reid. I didn't realise you and he had a history. If I did I wouldn't have given him the position. Regardless of what he can bring to Memorial. You are family, and that is so much more important. What you went through with Noah also. I just wish Reid wasn't here if he was going to make you more unhappy.

"I am not unhappy guys. I am fine."

Katie stepped forward again whilst she pushed Chris further back at the same time. "I don't know what you are at cause you don't talk to anyone about what you are feeling. You used to. People just want you to be happy because all you do is try to make others happy. I know what its like to lose a soul mate. I know how hard it is to move on. Cause I have." She squeezed Chris' hand.

"Katie, Reid wasn't my soul mate. We were teenagers who thought they were in love."

There was a significant silence as Katie looked shocked for some reason.

"Luke, I didn't mean Reid. I meant Noah."

Luke just sighed. More Noah. "Look Katie, maybe I have shut people out. But I just have never wanted to talk about Noah. But you have it wrong. You always have. Same with my parents and Maddie and Casey. Everyone. Noah was my best friend. Nothing more. Before I met Reid I thought it was more with Noah. but he never made me feel what I felt with Reid. Noah and I were confused back then. Him more so. But through all of it we were best friends. I would have done anything for him and he would have done the same for me. We weren't lovers, boyfriends or soul mates."

"Oh Luke, we all must have made everything so much worse with our constant pressuring."

He signed again but felt resigned to get this over with. "Not really. I could have talked about it. I could have corrected you all. I just wanted to keep Noah to myself. It's what he wanted. He wasn't like me, he was a very private person."

Katie reached up and wiped his tears away. "We love you Luke. Call me anytime if you ever need anything. Promise."

He laughed. "I promise."

As he got into his car he looked up to Katie's apartment and stopped dead for a moment. Reid was standing in the window staring down at him.


	11. Chapter 11

Katie knew exactly what would be ahead for her this week. She knew both Reid and Luke would try to pull out of the camping trip. So she planned her week very carefully. The beginning of the week she would spend avoiding both of them so they wouldn't have the chance to blow her off – and the last part of the week she would say it was too little notice and too much had been organised. She also recruited Maddie and Casey to help with Luke. Sadly no one would be interested in helping with Reid. He was down to her alone. So she was slightly surprised to not have to bother avoiding either Luke or Reid this week – they seemed to be doing a good job of that themselves. Which did make her slightly nervous. What were they up to? Well it was now Friday morning and she decided to bite the bullet and find out what was going on with both of them and to sort the details out about the trip. Little did she know – two other people had been thinking about this camping trip all week.

* * *

Luke was sitting at his desk reading memo after boring memo – not really taking anything in. Not realising he was clicking his pen endlessly and drvinig Alice completely nuts.

"For gods sake Luke stop that. No more coffee, you are so bloody on edge."

"Oh, sorry. I was just thinking."

"Well what are you up to this weekend? I am off to have a massage. You know I really appreciate this."

"Stop thanking me Alice. You work really hard and I want you to know I appreciate it. You need to take time regularly to rejuvenate. That way I can work you hard and not feel so guilty."

"It's my job – you cant feel guilty for making me do my job! But you do, cause that's you. But you know, you need to take some of your own advice. You never take a break, even more so recently. You need to get a life.'

"Alice I do have a life!"

"Please, playing chess with an old man, eating pizza with Casey and looking after your family is not having a life. And don't purse your lips at me, I am not going talking about Noah or anything related to him. You are pastey. You need some sun."

Luke stretched his arms out looking at his colour. She was right. He used to be tanned. He used to love the outdoors. He still did really, he just didn't take the time to enjoy it.

He suddenly got up and annopunced "Right I am off for the weekend."

"Oh, I didn't upset you Luke did I, I know I can be bossy. I'm sorry."

He laughed and kissed her on the cheek as he walked passed "Alice, I am actually taking your advice. I am going camping with Katie and Casey and a few others. We organised it a while ago." With that he left the office.

* * *

"Reid, are you listening to me? And stop clicking that pen for god sake. I am trying to sort this out. I know OH & S is boring but it needs to be addressed and as chief of staff it is your responsibility to ensure these guidelines are met!"

"Shut up Doogie, I have already said yes to all this. It is up to you now to do the rest."

Just then Katie barged into Chris' office.

"Ah, my gorgeous husband and best friend. Just who I am looking for."

"Well on that note, I am out of here. You two can make out without me here."

"No Reid, I want you actually."

He laughed. "I have told you shorty, I am gay."

"Very funny Reid. I am here to sort the details of the camping trip tomorrow."

Chris rose from his chair, kissed Katie on the cheek and left.

"Now Reid, I know you and I know you have been thinking of ways to get out of this but I wont have any of it. You are coming and that's final. You need to have friends other than myself in Oakdale."

"Jacob is my friend. And I put up with Doogie."

"One of them is a child and the other I know you only tolerate."

"Oh, I more than tolerate Jacob!"

"Ha Ha. Deep down I know you like Chris."

"Whatever. Anyway, I am not getting out of the camping trip. I think I might try and sort things out with Luke while we are there."

Katie gasped then squealed. "Really?"

"Don't get ahead of yourself. I meant sort it to a point that we can actually have a conversation together. Maybe talk about how things ended. Talk about his life since then."

"You mean Noah."

"Not just Noah, but he was part of his life for years. Anyway, I think this conversation is long overdue."

"That's good Reid, but I have to go. Pack your bags tonight, we leave at 5am."

"5am? That's ridiculous!" he yelled at her retreating back, at the same time thinking she left very suddenly. She has been begging him to sort this with Luke for years. She should be happy.

* * *

Luke was leaving a clothes shop laden with a few bags when he walked straight into Katie.

"Oh hey, how are you Katie?"

"Oh, Luke, I was looking for you!" She was very prepared for his speech of busy at work, family drama or whatever. So she was quite surprised when he asked

"So what time are we leaving tomorrow?"

"What? You're coming?"

"Oh, don't you want me to? Are you cancelling?"

"No, NO. I just, well, to be honest Luke, I thought you would cancel. BUT, I am really glad you aren't."

"Well, I know my track record so fair call. But I have been thinking about things recently and I need to change my life. Well, maybe just get back to living my life."

"By thinking, you mean Reid."

"Well partly."

"And by change does that mean you want him back in your life? I am so glad Luke cause you will never guess –"

"NO, wait. Hang on. I DO NOT want him back in my life. I blamed myself for a long time after he left. But in reality, he was to blame. He blew it years ago and I have realised that he doesn't deserve a second chance. I am moving on with my life, getting passed all my bad history. And Reid is only a small part of that history. But that is exactly what he is - History."

Katie just stood there staring at him. SHIT. What the hell is going on? What is with the change in these two? SHIT.

"Luke, Katie hi!"

"Hi Maddie" they both said in unison.

"What are you doing here Maddie?"

"Oh, meeting Luke. When he rang and said he was coming this weekend I just thought we could grab a coffee and sort details, like cars. I though Reid could go with you and Jacob. Jenny and Casey want their own car, something about sports crap filling the boot. Luke can come in the car with me and Cameron."

"Wait, I thought your boyfriend was called Giles." asked Luke.

"Well his name is Geoff actually, but he would also be my ex-boyfriend."

"So is Cameron a date?" Katie asked.

"Sort of, but not for me." She looked sheepishly at Luke.

"WHAT?" both Luke and Katie shouted.

"Don't get mad Luke. I haven't even mentioned you to him. He is a friend and I asked him to come. If something happens then so be it. And why do you care Katie? Luke can sleep with me if space is an issue? Or Cameron!"

"Stop it." Luke said. But flushed a little at the same time. Which did not go un-noticed by either girl. Katie frowned not liking where this was going and Maddie smirked feeling quite proud of herself.

"I have to go" Katie said.

"Hey, email me the map will you? Also we are all heading off around 5am?"

"Sure Maddie. See you Luke." This was going to be a long weekend. Lets hope Luke is consistent and knock this Cameron down, like he does to every guy he meets.


	12. Chapter 12

Luke sat on the steps to his unit tapping his foot and chewing his tongue. The latter was a strange habit he picked up as a child, a habit he always reverted to when he was concentrating but more so when he was nervous. Luke would be lying if he said he wasn't nervous. He would also be lying if he said he didn't know why. There were two reasons actually. One would be Reid and the other would be Cameron.

He was always peaking on some sort of emotion when around Reid. What he was focused on recently was anger. Maybe this was some sort of very delayed grieving process – something he should have gone through years ago when Reid broke his heart. Maybe he just stuffed it down and never dealt with it. Well, there was no maybe about it. He never dealt with it. He never moved on from Reid. Reid was the only man he ever loved. So if it is anger now - is it disinterest next?

But things have changed now. He can't dwell on the history that he and Reid had. Reid sure as hell isn't. Reid moved on. So it is about time Luke did. Now to the other reason Luke was anxious. Cameron. He had no idea who he was or anything about him. But it was kind of exciting. He kept trying to tell himself to chill out – he probably had a monobrow or wore crocs or was a boring accountant. That didn't change the fact that he was a little nervous to meet him. He hadn't really been on a date for years. They were always short lived boyfriends – if you could call them that – or hook ups. Nothing or no one worthwhile remembering.

So here he was, sitting on his steps waiting for his ride to arrive to go on a weekend away with the guy he has loved for years but whom he is determined to move on from and the potential guy he could be moving on with.

Hmm. Could be better.

Just then Maddie's car pulled up and she honked madly then jumped out of the car. The rest happened in slow motion. Well at least it felt like it did. The passenger door opened and out stepped the person that must be Cameron.

Luke felt his mouth drop open. He walked towards Luke with his hand outstretched. He had wavy brown hair and huge green eyes. He was tanned and the check short sleeved short he wore showed how incredibly cut he was. He paired those with khaki shorts and a pair of tigers. Luke felt himself salivate.

"Luke? Hi. I'm Cameron." Cameron shook Luke's hand firmly.

"Uh, Hi Cameron. Uh, nice to meet you."

"Yeah, you too. Maddie has been going on about you for months. But she left one important detail out."

Luke panicked for a second. Oh god, he thinks I am a loser. "Ah, what's that?"

Cameron laughed at Luke's grimace. "That you are hot."

Luke blushed a ridiculous red. "Come on, let's get this show on the road."

They loaded up the car with bags then their bodies. Luke mouthing to Maddie "He is gorgeous." Maddie the smart arse just smirked.

Luke realised this was going to be a great weekend.

The drive was a lot of fun. The three of them got on really well. Luke and Cameron had a lot in common – same taste in music, large full on family, and they both seemed as outgoing as the other. Cameron was more outdoorsy. The way Luke used to be – but Cameron was more intense with it. He spent the last part of the trip talking about skydiving and trying to persuade Luke and Maddie to go with him.

They got to the cabin quickly and were unloading the car when the awkward started.

Maddie was blathering about natural hot spas and how good they were for your pores and wandering if there would be one here. Cameron was laughing about this not quite being the right area and Luke was staring at Cameron. He had an incredible smile.

They did not notice their audience above. The rest of the group were sitting on the deck having lunch. Jenny, Casey, Katie and Reid – and of course Jacob – were all watching the others arrive.

Jenny elbowed Katie and said "God, Maddie's boyfriend is hot!"

Just at that minute Cameron leant forward and lowered his voice so Maddie couldn't hear. "Why are you staring at me Luke?"

"I wasn't, I was just looking at… I wasn't."

Cameron just laughed.

"Fine! I was staring." He then looked down at his feet and started chewing his lip. This is so fucking awkward.

Cameron picked up his bag and as he walked passed Luke he again leant in close "I don't mind, you think I'm not staring back?"

Luke spun around with a smile, which then faltered as he saw their audience.

That said audience was showing a mix of emotions.

"That's not Maddie's boyfriend – he's gay." Katie said.

Casey didn't seem to care and Jenny seemed excited.

As Katie stared at Reid, he simply stared at Luke for a moment too long. His rapid blinking the only sign that the display below affected him at all.

Luke felt the awkward get more awkward.

* * *

As Luke threw his bag onto his bed he realized what a bad idea this was. He might just hide out in his room all weekend. Pretend he is sick. Just as he was deciding that was stupid Casey knocked on his door then walked in.

"Lets go play some soccer. We haven't done that in years."

"Sure Case."

"Do you reckon we can recruit the others? Maybe not Reid. What about Cameron?"

Jenny walked in on the tail end and chimed in with "Cameron? Definitely! He looks very sporty."

"Pipe down – you are my girlfriend and he is gay!"

"I don't know – lets find out. Are you jealous of a gay man? You have never been jealous of me." Luke said.

"Ah. Mate's code of honour you see. I know you. You would never break it. That's just who you are."

Then Cameron walked into his room and also joined the conversation. "Mates code! Good work lads. The only rule I never break. Maybe also wearing socks with thongs too. Foul."

"Oh god, you are just like Luke! He once dumped a guy for wearing crocs!"

The group thought this was just a little too funny for Luke's liking.

"Alright alright out of my room. Onto the grass. Let me get changed."

They all trudged outside.

As he was about to pull a polo on, someone coughed in the doorway.

"I said I was coming! Give me a minute!" Luke said as he spun around.

He just stood there as Reid raised his eyebrows. "Only a minute?"

Luke hurriedly put his shirt on as he noticed Reid was staring at his chest. He flushed but secretly was pleased that he got Reid's attention and tried to ignore his blantantly sexual comment.

"Are you coming down to play soccer Reid?"

"Doubt it. I don't want to break my livelihood." He started waving his fingers around.

"Oh well, everyone else is." Luke just brushed past him, no longer wanting to be alone with him in his room.

"Wait Luke, can we talk later?"

"What about?"

"Just can we make some time to talk over the weekend?"

"We will be here for three days, I am sure we can talk in three days"

"Luke, you know I mean alone. Anyway, we will sort it later." Reid then left Luke in the room, feeling a bit confused and just a little more anxious.

_Talk, about what? Shit. _

Luke walked outside to see Casey chanting the Brazil anthem, taunting Jenny, Maddie and Katie as they tried to get the ball from him. Cameron was clutching his ribs laughing and looking oh so hot in a bonds singlet that was way too tight. Luke realized he didn't mind that his own polo was a little tight too. He knew he was pretty fit and all of a sudden was very glad for it.

They had been fooling around for about 10 minutes when Reid came out also. What shocked Luke was that he was wearing combat shorts and a singlet also. He seemed ready to play soccer too.

He walked passed Luke and took in his stare of surprise.

"What, I like sport. All sports. Its been years Luke. You don't know that much about me anymore."

"Did I even then?" Luke turned and walked in the opposite direction.

Katie decided she needed to supervise Jacob – but it also made the teams even.

Casey decided he was the most skilled followed by Cameron. So they decided to split themselves up – with Katie and Luke in a team with Casey – whom the latter titled the locals and with Reid and Jenny in a team with Cameron – whom Casey called the imposters.

It was actually a kind of even mix of skills. Both Maddie and Jenny were useless. Reid and Luke weren't too bad and Casey and Cameron were, unfortunately for everyone that had to put up with Casey's ego, the best.

Every time Casey scored a goal he pulled his shirt over his head and ran around in circles whistling and chanting Brazil. Which only succeeded in annoying Maddie and Jenny. Jacob also seemed annoyed as he kept throwing cheese cubes at him.

Luke found he wasn't really concentrating. He couldn't take his eyes off both his opponents – Reid and Cameron. Luke knew he hadn't hid this from Reid – who pretended he didn't notice. Cameron on the other hand – whether he noticed or not – just took every opportunity to touch Luke. He would nudge him with his shoulders when he ran passed, trip him intentionally then turn and smile, tackle him then help him up. He was helping him up after the last tackle when Cameron decided to not let go of Luke's hand. Then with the other hand he wiped some dirt off his face.

Luke could feel his heart race a little. This guy was so fucking hot and he actually wants me.

"Hello! Get a room!" Casey shouted then further interrupted them by throwing a cheese cube that was already thrown at him by Jacob, at them.

They both laughed and as he ran off, Cameron nudged Luke again. Luke felt himself smiling. He turned, slowly chewing his bottom lip and ended up facing Reid. He was staring at Luke and wouldn't look away. He didn't say a thing. He had no expression on his face. Yet he wouldn't stop staring.

For some reason, this made Luke furious. He felt the anger pool in his stomach. He marched up to Reid. "What?" he barked at him.

Reid then reacted, sort of. He did that blinking thing again.

That angered Luke even more. Why can't he just react like a normal person.

"What, that's all I get? Would it kill you to show an emotion Reid?" with that Luke turned his back and stormed away back to the game. When he turned around he saw Reid had left the field. He saw Katie grab Jacob and run after Reid. What the hell was that about.

You know what? Luke thought to himself? I don't care. This is the summer of Luke. Only its winter. Thats ok, point still applies. I am going to think about myself and make myself happy. And right now there is a hot man in a singlet flirting outrageously with me. And you know what? I am in.


	13. Chapter 13

Katie, Reid and Jacob spent the rest of the day on a bush walk. Katie had told everyone there was a river just a few kilometres away. The rest of the group, including Luke, spent the day recovering from their soccer game that went on too long, by lying around the deck drinking beer. Although they were all having fun just mucking around, Luke felt himself more and more distracted.

At first when he snapped at Reid he felt good, vindicated really. But as the time went on he realised no matter how much Reid hurt him all those years ago, he didn't want to repay the favour. Reid was right, they did need to talk. Luke just wanted to avoid the inevitable conversation that would end with Reid saying he had moved on. Luke knew it had happened he just didn't need to hear it.

Luke got up and walked away, needing some space to think. He walked around the other side of the cabin and found Cameron setting up fishing rods.

"Hey Luke, Casey and I are going fishing in the morning. Want to come?"

"Ah, ok, I haven't fished for years. Not since the pond near my family's house."

"Alright – nice and early though – no sleeping in. We can see if Reid wants to come too - It can be a boy's thing. Maddie has already told me she doesn't eat anything with eyes. Crazy!"

"Ah, sure, great." _Great. Just great._

Cameron noticed Luke's expression. "You know Luke, I am sure you can tell I like you. We seem to have hit it off but I am not blind. I can see there is or was something going on with you and Reid."

Luke sighed. What a mess. Way to fuck so much up in a few hours.

"It's not a criticism Luke. Just an acknowledgement."

"Cameron, to be honest, if I had met you before Reid came back to town different story. But he and I have so much unfinished business, it feels wrong to not sort that out first."

Cameron stood and put the fishing rods down. He walked over and rubbed his fingers along Luke's cheek. "Pity, but thanks for being honest."

Just then Cameron looked over Reid's shoulder "Hey guys, how was the walk? Did you check out the river? I am organising a fishing run in the morning for the boys – you in Reid?"

"Sure."

Luke felt himself blush again. I swear, he thought to himself – I am going to get an ulcer. This is too much.

Reid then turned and walked back in the direction he came and Cameron wandered over to where the rest of the group was. Katie walked close to Luke and raised her eyebrows.

"Don't start Katie. I haven't done anything wrong. Well, no more than him anyway."

"You tell yourself that Luke, but let me ask you one thing. Why Cameron and why now?"

"The entire town has been nagging me to live my life. I have suffered being set up by all of you for years! And now when I make an attempt to sort my life out you get mad."

She raised her eyebrows and walked passed him. Then turned back and said "I love you Luke, you know that. But I love him too. For god's sake just talk."

Luke groaned as he acknowledged Katie was right. Bitch. He should have left her in the dark when it came to Reid. Would have been a much better idea.

He followed down the path that he saw Reid take. He assumed it would take him to the river where he and Katie had just been. After he had been walking for a while the path split into two directions. Realising the likelihood that Luke would choose the wrong path, his luck was so awesome, he chose one and headed off to the right towards god knows where and probably not Reid.

He had been walking for nearly an hour and not found Reid. He was about to turn around when he entered a clearing that had a hill at the opposite end. There was a huge tree atop the hill. Luke circled the tree then found an area to sit, leaning on the tree.

He sat there thinking about his life. About how messed up it became years ago and he still couldn't seem to see himself being happy. He wondered why Reid had come back. Just when Luke thought he might move on and try to find some sort of peace with his life someone decided to shit on him. When it came to Reid he didn't know what to do. What do you do when you love someone and they don't love you back. How do you be near them? Maybe the only way was to fake it and try to be his friend. He didn't want that but he didn't want to not be near him. Now that Reid was back in Oakdale, Luke realised he needed him to breathe.

The afternoon sun was a lot less warm than earlier and he felt himself dozing off, wishing that Reid was at least feeling something that he was.

* * *

Down the other path was Reid. He had stomped down the left path wishing he had never been so stupid to come back to Oakhell. Never been so stupid to come on this camping trip. Now he had to watch Cameron and Luke start a relationship. He always knew Luke would move on, it was his way to have everyone fall in love with him. But he didn't have to be a witness to it.

He made it to the river he and Katie were at before. He stripped off to his boxers and walked in. The water was so clear he could see the bottom. He felt the cool water sharply on his hot sweaty body. After floating around for a while he felt a whole lot more calm but definitely not ready to go back to the cabin. He trudged out of the water wishing he had someone other than Katie to talk to – cause all she talked about was Luke. He walked up the path towards the cabin, then decided to take the other path – maybe it led to cliff he could jump off.

As he walked up the hill of the clearing, he saw a body leaning on the tree. He knew immediately it was Luke. And he was asleep. As he got closer he looked at him closely. Even asleep in the outback or wherever they were he was gorgeous. It was those lips. Or maybe his little quaff. Whatever it was, it really turned Reid on.

He leant forward and pushed Luke sideways until his back slipped from the tree, he then toppled onto the grass.

"Ummph" He groggily rubbed his eyes and looked up at Reid.

Reid thought pushing him around a bit might make him feel better – not when he now had to witness sleepy Luke. He just groaned - where is that cliff?

"The sun is about to set Luke, a bear will eat you." He turned and started to walk down the hill.

"Wait Reid"

"No Luke, I am going back to the cabin. You just shouldn't stay here when it's getting dark."

"Reid please, talk to me."

He spun around then "Oh, now you want to talk!"

He marched up the hill towards Luke and he saw the younger man falter. Luke then with all the grace of an elephant stumbled as he tripped over his own feet and rolled down the hill a little.

With that Reid burst out in laughter. He could barely stand he was laughing so hard. He dropped to his knees and rolled onto his back.

"It's not that funny, I hurt my knee. See look! There's blood!"

Reid looked over at Luke's legs. He reached out suddenly and rubbed his finger over Luke's knee. As he did so both men gasped. Luke slowly ran his hand up the arm rubbing his leg. Being touched by Luke felt like it did all those years ago. He felt like he couldn't breathe.

He was about to pull away knowing this was not a good idea when he felt Luke tug on his arm and breathe out his name. Reid looked into those eyes that haunted him for years and saw the same longing he knew was reflected in his. He rolled sideways and nudged his face towards Luke, which Luke matched and he finally kissed the lips he had dreamed about for so long. He felt the desire pool in his crotch. He traced Luke's lips slowly with his tongue until Luke moaned his own open in response.

God it felt good to touch him again. No one since him had ever had this same effect on Reid. He completely lost his mind when he was with Luke. Reid then half straddled Luke and wedged his own leg between both of Luke's. He could feel Luke's erection and rubbed him with his leg as his hand slipped under his t-shirt to touch his skin. The skin he was fantasizing about since he saw it this morning.

Reid got a lot of pleasure out of the tremor he felt run through Luke as he touched his skin above his pants and at the same time rubbed his erection that was straining for release.

All of a sudden Reid felt this wave of panic overtake him. This was not meant to happen. He didn't want Luke like this. Not after they had so much shit to sort out. He rolled off Luke and jumped to his feet. "I can't do this." Needing to put some distance between himself and Luke, he walked towards the tree. He could barely see straight.

Luke hadn't moved from the ground. He could see him panting trying to compose himself, flushed bright red and lips parted and wet. Reid acknowledged he still wanted him so badly. Luke slowly rose and turned towards Reid, with his head held down. As he lifted his head Reid saw anger in his eyes.

"Well don't just stand there, why don't you repeat most encounters with me and walk away. You are so good at it."

Reid felt like he had been slapped. Twice in one day from Luke. Where had his Luke gone? This Luke was more like him and he didn't like it one bit.

"Fuck you Luke, I-"

"No you didn't actually Reid."

"That's the point Luke, I don't want to fuck you"

"Well I think we have established that Reid."

"No just listen Luke."

"No Reid, you listen. Fifteen years ago you walked away from me. Away from us. For nothing. You never spoke to me, never said goodbye. Nothing. Over the years, nothing. All my writing I sent ou - I never showed anyone else. You knew how important my writing was to me - but you just ignored them. Do you actually feel anything?"

"Wait, what writing?"

"Don't bullshit me. Doesn't matter now anyway. It was years ago. What I want to know is why are you back? Why? You don't like anyone here. You don't like this town. I know I was the only one apart from Katie that you spoke to regularly and you sure as hell don't like me anymore. You just want a fuck – for what, old times sake? - but only on your terms."

"Well you weren't exactly complaining. Or maybe you were warming up for Cameron."

"And if I was? You sound jealous Reid. We both know that's not possible. You would have to feel something for me to actually feel jealous if someone wanted me."

"No one can live up to the ex-boyfriend can they?"

"What? " he spluttered. "You know what Reid, you are a bastard." Luke started to walk away. "So I still feel something for you. You have no right to mock me for it. At least I feel. You are like a wooden plank."

He felt something for me? What the fuck? He shouted down the hill "I was talking about Noah you know. This whole town talks about how you are pining for Noah." Luke had stopped walking when he mentioned Noah. He slowly turned and walked up the hill. He kept walking until he was only a breath away from Reid.

"What's worse Reid. That you are so wrong about me and Noah, as everyone else is, or that you mock me for it?"

"Well forgive me for not wanting to be his seconds."

Luke looked like he was going to cry. Those ridiculous brown eyes were all pooled up with tears. He slowly blinked them away then leant forward and whispered in Reid's ear.

"It was always you Reid, you just didn't trust me enough." He then turned and walked down the hill away from Reid.

Reid felt like he couldn't get any air. What just happened? They had the most stupid conversation about their past and all Reid could remember about it was Luke's last statement. It was always you.


	14. Chapter 14

Luke felt himself nearly run back to the cabin. He wished he could make Reid understand what he had felt for him all those years ago. He wished Reid were here when he needed him when Noah died. He wished he could just talk to him without either of them losing their cool and achieving nothing.

Luke sat outside on the deck; the others were inside getting ready for dinner. As he sat alone he started to think that maybe what he was feeling for Reid was just unresolved drama and residual feelings. Reid was bothered by what he did as a teenager. He thought Luke was the same person that hurt him all those years ago. He on the other hand felt the exact same way about Reid. Like now that he was back in his life – well at least in his vicinity – then he could no longer imagine him not being there.

Surely if Reid could kiss him like that then he must feel something more than just – what – he just wanted sex? Reid had made all these assumptions about him – just like everyone else – and then judged him.

"Hey Luke, where have you been? Food is ready" Casey called out through the kitchen window.

He made his way inside, and sat down, just as Reid entered the cabin from the other direction.

God this is actually very awkward. Luke looked away and straight at Katie. Who looked at Reid. Who looked at Luke. Who looked at his feet. Chewing his lip.

Through the entire meal half the group where animatedly talking about various topics, the other portion of the group consisted of Katie and Luke straining to talk. Katie uncomfortable because she knew something was going down with Luke and Reid. Luke uncomfortable as Reid was staring at him through the entire meal.

He continued to push his food around his plate until someone else put their cutlery down, his cue to get out of there. So he jumped to his feet and started cleaning some plates and headed to the kitchen. Cameron followed him to the kitchen and started helping.

"So Luke, you and Reid enjoy your walk?" Cameron asked him as he elbowed him near the sink.

Luke felt himself blush. "Sshhh!" he said as he elbowed him.

Cameron just laughed in response. "Thought so. Is that why you ran from the dinner table?"

"I didn't run. I walked with purpose."

"Sure."

"I had finished eating."

"Sure"

"I am tired. I want an early night." He nearly shouted.

"Tired?" Casey then decided to join the conversation that he could now hear. "No chance Luke, it's games night!"

He groaned in response. "Well as long as its not twister."

"I am up for twister!" Maddie said.

"Celebrity head"

"Trivial pursuit"

"Scrabble"

This went on for 10 minutes while they all argued about which was the superior game.

"Since we are all arguing anyway, why don't we just play pictionary?" Luke heard himself suggesting. Pointless obviously as his suggestion was followed with silence.

Then he wished he hadn't spoken at all, knowing he couldn't avoid playing now.

"Brilliant"

"Ooohh I love pictionary"

"Yes! But I bags not Luke – he completely sucks at this." Casey said.

Maddie agreed, "Don't look like that Luke – it's true!" He felt himself laughing at this, knowing it was true.

"Well you were never very good at chess either." Reid said and looked Luke in the eye whilst red crept up his neck.

More staring from all directions this time. No one expected Reid to contribute. No one apart from Katie knew that he actually knew anyone well enough in Oakdale.

Twenty minutes later Luke was standing at the coffee machine pumping out coffees for the group. Wishing he had just gone to bed earlier. This was going to be a long night.

"C'mon Luke!"

"Alright. Last one."

"You are obsessed with coffee man," Casey complained.

"No I'm not. I just am very particular when it comes to coffee and this is a nespresso machine. A bit like mine. I love these machines. I remember my first coffee machine." Luke ran his hands along the machine, thinking back to the first machine he had. He got it from his grandmother years ago. It was the summer Reid left. After he got out of hospital and found out Reid had left him, he sort of lost it for a while. He stayed in his room, avoided his family, writing.

It was not until his grandmother Lucinda intervened and dragged him off for answers. She had said she was taking him for lunch. She had actually arranged for a bag to be packed and she took him to her cottage. She sat him down and demanded to know where her grandson had gone.

He told her about the debate team, about Reid, about Noah, about everything. She wanted to know what he had been doing since and when he told her he had been doing nothing much, but some writing. She decided to leave him there, with his laptop, food and phone. Said come home if and when he was ready. But never to avoid his family again.

She arranged for groceries to be delivered and he actually lived there for a few years. One day a few weeks after he set up there, his grandmother arrived with a large box in her arms.

"Luke darling, I have a gift for you."

"Grandmother, you let me live at your cottage, buy me food. I don't need more gifts." He hugged her tight.

"Stop. You are my grandson. I will do anything for you. And what I am doing now is giving you this so that you can stop drinking that instant crap. I know you don't like plunger coffee. If you are going to drown in coffee while you write, or any other time then at least do it appropriately." She placed the box into his lap.

He immediately opened it and found himself salivate at what he was holding – the most amazing coffee machine, the one with pods. He has never looked back. He has upgraded twice, but only when the machine had given up the ghost and packed it in. He always returned to the same brand.

"Hello, Luke? It looks like you want to have sex with that coffee machine."

"What?" he realised Casey was talking to him, as he got disturbed from his trip down memory lane.

"Where the hell did you go? And why where you fondling the coffee machine while you were there?"

He felt himself flush, he laughed. "Like I said, I was just thinking about my first coffee machine."

"Oh, I remember. That was the summer of no-Luke. You completely disappeared and holed yourself up at Lucinda's cabin. All you did was write. And drink coffee. You wouldn't hang out with any of us. I blame the coffee machine. Then you and I went on that road trip to Washington State University, and all of a sudden you were back. The old Luke. And you never looked back."

As Casey recounted the story, Luke watched Reid, who was looking into his glass through the story until his head snapped up to look at Luke when Casey mentioned Washington State University.

It was now or never. Lets get this started.

"Yeah yeah, so I love decent coffee, among other things." Not for a second did Luke stop looking at Reid.


	15. Chapter 15

Over the next few hours the group played a progressively more ridiculous game of pictionary. Casey and Maddie were completely drunk so their partners, Jenny and Cameron respectively, were not having much luck with the game. Katie long ago left the room to check on Jacob. Which left Reid and Luke partnered up.

This did start out awkwardly for Luke, he did hope that Reid didn't notice that. Since Luke knew he couldn't really hide anything from anyone, he gave up trying. But he did get a little joy out of Reid clenching his jaw every time Luke sat down next to him.

The longer they played the more annoyed Reid seemed to be getting. This seemed to be distracting Luke as well. He just wanted to talk to Reid. To try and make amends so they could be friends or something like that. That would be better than awkward.

Thankfully the group finally seemed over the game.

"Right, Case, we are off to bed." Jenny tried to drag him off the lounge. He was at that point in time not really listening to her but trying to cheat by peeking at the cards. She finally got his attention by whispering something in his ear. Seeing him race off the lounge and depart the room dragging her with him, she proved how well she knew him.

Maddie was proceeding to stretch out on the lounge putting her legs up on Luke's lap. God, he thought to himself. I just want to be alone with Reid – do I need to drag him out to the forest again?

Cameron laughed at the expression on Luke's face, knowing what he wanted. "Alright Maddie, lets go try out this spa."

"No, I am comfy here."

"Foul, get your feet off poor Luke. If he is anything like me he is grossed out right now."

"Luke loves my feet!" Maddie cried out.

"I hate feet." Luke said.

"Except mine." Reid had leant over and whispered into his ear.

Luke turned sharply to look at Reid. Who was staring intently at him. Out of the corner of his eye Luke saw Cameron drag a protesting Maddie outside. She only stopped complaining when he stopped to grab two bottles of sparkling wine.

Reid went to stand then. Luke felt his hand shoot out of its own accord and grab Reid's forearm. "Wait. Stay."

"Luke, I can't handle another argument like before. I am just too damn tired."

"I don't want to argue."

"That's all we do though."

"Reid, we only argue because we don't bloody talk. Something we didn't do back when we broke up last time. I want us to get to a point where we can be friends, or something else. But even if that never happens, don't you think we owe it to each other to sort through our shit from all those years ago?"

Reid just sat there staring at him. Luke felt the hope slowing disappear. Wow, he really doesn't care.

Reid just laughed. "It's your idea to talk, so start!"

"Well now that this is happening I feel really unprepared."

"It's only been 15 years."

"Well a lot has happened in 15 years."

"Ok. Start at the beginning. The party. The kiss."

Great. He wants to start there.

"Reid, you didn't even give me a chance to explain all those years ago. You really think you can listen this time and –'

"I asked didn't I?"

"AND actually believe what I have to say?"

"Just talk."

"HE kissed ME. I meant it back then when I said I loved you Reid. HE kissed ME."

"Well before me you loved him."

"No Reid, Noah and I weren't in love. We never had a relationship the way you and I did. I think I was infatuated with him, I don't know – I was really confused about being gay. I was never in love with him. Before I met you Noah and I were both pretty immature. He was a mess thanks to his father and what he really needed was a friend. I think I kind of thought his need for companionship was more than what it really was. I was his friend and we got really close – like family."

"That sounds ridiculous."

"Noah and I both had a fair amount of time to sort through all this and –"

"You know. I think I don't want to know about you and Noah right now."

"Well you know what Reid. You picked the topic. You said the party. The kiss. So I am telling you whether you want to hear or not. I never got my chance to speak back then. I loved you. He kissed me. You punched me and then ran away like a coward."

"I was not a coward."

"Yes you were!"

"NO I WASN'T! You broke my heart. You cheated on me and broke my heart." As he yelled at Luke he jumped up from the lounge and was pointing down at him.

Luke rose to meet him. Pointing just as violently as him. "No Reid. You made a mistake, more than one as a matter of fact. You misjudged me and you walked away from something great. From us. You fucked it all up. You should have talked to me not punched me."

"and you sure as hell shouldn't have walked away from us. I didn't do what you thought. But even if I did, we were kids then. That was a life time ago."

Reid still just looked at him. But he sighed and sat down.

"Fine" Reid said. "Can we say that you put yourself in a stupid situation and I over reacted?"

"Over reacted?"

"Badly?"

Luke could see a smile forming on Reid's lips. He felt himself laugh.

"Ok. But can we agree it was a long time ago anyway and we are different people now?"

"Sure."

Well this is a start Luke thought to himself. Only a start. Reid still didn't look all that happy. "This topic is not closed Luke. For another day."

"So I have some questions." Luke said.

"Nope."

Ok, so maybe not a start at all. Maybe I should jump ship here and go to bed.

"Me first" said Reid.

"Oh, alright."

"What were you talking about when you said I didn't read your writing? I haven't seen any of your writing."

"Bullshit Reid. I gave lots to your mum. She said whenever you came home she would give you some."

"But I never came home. Until now."

"I haven't finished. I asked her once about them and she said she gave them to Katie to give to you because you got mad whenever she mentioned me so she stopped."

"Katie."

"Yes Katie. I never asked what she did with them."

"I never let Katie talk to me about you."

God that hurt. "Never?"

"Don't you even think about looking at me with those eyes."

"What eyes."

"Those 'you-have-hurt-me-so-much-puppy-dog-I-am-about-to-cry' eyes."

Luke could feel himself blush at that.

"And now you are blushing. Brilliant."

"Stop it Reid. You always made me-"

Reid stepped closer to him. Right up in his face. "Made you what?"

Luke could feel the blush intensify.

"C'mon Luke, made you what?"

"Blush. You always made me blush."

Reid just stood there smirking.

"Alright alright. Your questions."

"Why did you go to Washington State campus?"

"Pass."

"Answer me Luke."

"Next question."

"Luke. Tell me why you came to my campus."

Luke jut sighed. He had hoped Reid had missed the details of Casey's earlier conversation. Realising he had be honest with Reid he decided to just get it over with.

"What did Casey mean the summer of no-Luke."?

"After you left I missed you. Reid, I loved you so much and then the next minute you were gone. All I could think about was how much I wanted to you back. How unfair life had been to me. How much I missed you.

I holed myself up in my grandmother's cabin writing. I spent months writing down how I was feeling into stories. This helped me lots but then I just thought bugger it. I will go and tell you to your face everything that I wanted you to hear. So I dragged Casey on a road trip to your campus. I decided I wasn't going to leave until you were back in my life. It was what I wanted. I was miserable without you. I needed you to be happy.

Once we got there I realised I had no idea how to find you. Where would you be? Casey ended up trying to pick up some girl. Which was perfect really. It left me alone to start my big search. So I started at the library. I wandered around there for ages. I started to realise how pointless it was.

So I left the library and that's when I heard it. Something so rare. But something I knew very well. Your laughter. And that's when I saw you. You were with a group of people, all standing around. I remember thinking you were so fucking hot. Especially when you smiled.

And that's when I realised what a selfish bastard I was. I was there, thinking how much I needed to have you back. But you were happy without me. Really happy. I was so stupid. Selfish and stupid. So I left."

Luke stood there, feeling like an idiot. Whilst Reid just stared, saying nothing. He felt himself getting more and more uncomfortable.

While Luke fiddled with the hem of his shirt, Reid stepped closer. Luke could feel himself let out a breath as Reid grabbed his hands.

"Stop fiddling. Last question. What do you want now Luke. And not just right this minute. Cause right this minute I want you. But I want more than that. But I need to know what you want."

Luke could feel his heart hammering in his chest. He was hot. He couldn't get enough air. Just breathe you idiot.

"I want us to have a second chance. A fresh start."

And there it was. A smile on Reid's beautiful face. Seconds before Reid pulled them closer. Closer until their lips touched.


End file.
